Thursday, September 29, 2005

Aquarius Love

This is eerily true...

Aquarius is the last of the Air signs of the Zodiac and is a member of the Fixed group of signs. Those born under this sign have a need to be ‘ahead of the game’. They derive satisfaction from thinking differently to others. It is a complement to them to be described as eccentric and deviant (though they may deny this!). They love to be contradictory. Idiosyncrasies may be developed as a way of stating that they are different.

Yet Aquarius people long for everyone to be treated as equal and will fight to preserve the rights of the individual. This can give rise to difficulties. Aquarius people think futuristically and can be defiant and rebellious in justifying a decision or course of action. They have a tendency to inconsistency and others may find them disruptive. Yet they are excellent at absorbing information. Conclusions reached may be astounding and border on the genius. Those born under Aquarius need to feel appreciated for this uniqueness and may become bad-tempered and outspoken if ignored. They also, as one of the Fixed signs, need to know where they stand. They may advocate change but dislike change that is thrust upon them. At such times they become tense, defiant and difficult.


Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Rest In Peace, Ebony.

Here's hoping that you have unlimited treats in doggie heaven.

And to Ree, Chelsey, and family, words cannot express how sorry I am for your loss. :-(

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Kickin' It In NYC

So I spent this weekend up in NYC celebrating the 25th birthday of my bestest friend and college roommate of three years, Michelle (you may know her as the owner of the only male cat in the universe named "Buffy"). It was a great weekend... once I managed to actually make it there, that is!

I decided this time that rather than taking a train from Philly to Trenton and then another from Trenton to Penn Station, I would just drive to Trenton and go straight from there. The idea was that I'd save both time and money. Ha. I should have known better that my fantastic ideas never work out as planned.

I got out of work at 3 and, after dropping off a co-worker, I headed straight there. Amazingly, there wasn't too much traffic and I made it there with little to no hassle. I even found the train station on the first time around. I pulled into the sort-term parking lot and was about to park, when I realised that, since I was going to be gone the whole weekend, I might want to look for a long-term parking lot. I accidentally drove by it the first time, and due to several closed streets and detours, I had to take a little side-trip through the bowels of Trenton. All I'm going to say is that it is an absolute disgrace that our state's capitol looks like such shit. Someone needs to get in there and clean that place up, asap. Seriously.

Anyway, after much, much, much hassle, I finally was able to park in the long term lot and made a train. Not the train I was aiming for, but a train nonetheless, and at that point, I'd have taken anything I could have gotten.

I finally made it to Michelle's apartment by 8 and we caught up a little before our festivities began. We started off by going to some place that I can't remember the name of, sitting outside, and drinking Turpentine Martinis. Well, they were supposed to be some sort of raspberry-pineapple concoction, but all it amounted to was a crushed raspberry sitting at the bottom of a glass of acid. Not easy to get down by any means, but for $10 a piece, we drank those mofos.

We then headed to a Irishy sort of pub that I also can't remember the name of, and got some awesome veggie burgers and a few more drinks. We didn't want to overdo it because our major festivities weren't until the following night. We managed to hold to this for once and made it home in a completely coherent (but definitely jolly) state. Go us.

The next morning we did a little shopping and ate some veggie wraps. Fairly uneventful but enjoyable day! The weather was really nice, too, so that's always good. Actually, Michelle did buy a six pack of Modela at a little Bodega and as she was walking it up to the counter, the bottom of the cardboard holder fell out and the bottles all fell out... so I guess you can count that as eventful. :-)

Then we headed home to make ourselves beautiful for our big night out with the group. Michelle's extremely sweet boyfriend Matt showed up the door with a cake, complete with 25 burning candles, prompting the neighbour girls to ask if he had any cute friends. :-) Another party-goer and friend, Lauren, showed up with cupcakes, so God knows how many calories we inhaled that night. Weight Watcher's be damned!!!

It's Matt's birthday next week, so it was actually sort of a joint celebration. We headed to Mo's Caribbean on the UES for some booze and Mexican (a chimichanga in my case). We were a group of 10 so they sat us outside and it was really, really nice. Everyone was just drinking and chatting and reminiscing and stuff. Michelle and I regaled the group about our stories of legally insane college roommates, and one of the other party-goers told a real doozy about someone pooping on a fence (don't ask). We took tons of pics, so expect to see some of those soon.

We hit up 2 more bars before stumbling home and calling it a night. As usual, I sat up front with the cab driver and made friends. You can never have too many friends as far as I'm concerned. :-)

So, a good weekend was had by all. Unfortunately we never got to play the Law & Order board game I bought for Michelle, but we'll save that for next time. Wouldn't want to have too much fun in one weekend, after all.

And on that note, I'd like to wish Michelle one more big fat Happy Birthday, seeing as today is the actual day:

PS When I got back to Trenton today, I found that the long-term lot costs $18 a day, compared to the short term's $5 a day, so all that detour travelling on Friday was for naught! Oh well, now I know.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Miss You, Dad.

Congratulations Moz!

Muchos congratulationos to my boy Morrissey for winning the Linda McCartney Memorial Award at PETA’s recent 25th Anniversary Gala and Humanitarian Awards Show. As I once mentioned, working for Morrissey is what ultimately made me decide to go vegetarian, so I'm extremely happy to see him get this award. No one deserves it more!!!

Click the picture to read all about it, and to see Moz's acceptance speech from Rome, where he's recording his new album.

You go, Moz.

Okay, this is just hilarious!!

Click the photo to see the pic with a full explanation at the genius website, Gallery of the Absurd.

Monday, September 19, 2005

Hello... Is It Me You're Looking Like?

Okay, so Nicole Richie is definitely stylish. As we know, she even won a Young Hot Hollywood Style Award. Of course people are going to look to her for style ideas. But inspiration and flat-out imitation are two different things. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but if I was Nicole, I'd be sick of people stealing my looks!!!

Let's Review:

First we had Nicky...

Then came Kim...

And now even Lindsay's jumped on the "I wanna look like Nicole" bandwagon...

She's totally got the facial expression, stance, and peek-a-boo boob down pat. Watch your back, Nicole!! Mischa's probably next!!

Where's the Penguin Sex?

Would-be Man of My Dreams, Alistair Appleton has seen March of the Penguins, and he's not happy!!

Prudish Penguins

Scary Tyler Moore

I was watching Nick at Nite last night (as only the coolest people do) and there was a commercial on for some sort of charity that featured a bunch of Nick at Nite "stars" like Dick Van Dyk, Tony Danza, Alyssa Milano, and Mary Tyler Moore (among others). To be honest, I couldn't even tell you what the commercial was for, because I was far too distracted by the grossly over-surgeried Mary Tyler Moore. I can't even explain how frightening she looks. It not only looks like she has her hair in a REALLY tight bun, (which she doesn't) but it also looks like someone greased her up with something, giving her face a really sickly silvery sort of glow. Horrid. The picture below doesn't even do it justice. What she looks like in the commercial is somewhere between that photo, Jocelyn Wildenstein, and a cat. Gross.

Who can turn the world on with her unnatural, tightly pulled, veneered smile?

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Ashley Olsen Can See Your Soul

Nicole McBeal

Nicole Richie is starting to look more and more like Calista Flockhart every day!

Lunch With Lindsay

A-drinkin' and a-smokin' and...

A-pickin' and a-drinkin' some more!

(This time white wine instead of red and... um... through a straw?).

I love celebrities.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Happy Birthday Emily

Today, my friend Emily turns 25. We're going out to celebrate by shopping, eating and drinking until we burst. I don't know about you, but I don't think there's a better way to ring in a quarter century, do you?

Happy Birthday Em!

I've Seen Better Weeks.

What a week.

As we know, it started out with a bang on Sunday night, when Simon decided that it'd been a while since he'd seen what my face tasted like. Yay. Well, as it happens, that was pretty much the highlight of my week, as things only went downhill from there.

On Tuesday, I went to pick Colleen up from the airport, as you also know. Of course I had to drive around the airport terminal 3 separate times because the airport cops chase you away if the person you're picking up isn't perched directly on the edge of the curb, waiting to toss their belongings into your car and hop in (If you don't have to actually stop the car, that's a plus). On my first trip around, I ended up somewhere near the Philadelphia Zoo, which, if you know anything about Philadelphia, you'll know that that's not really near the airport at all. Woo hoo. I guess I didn't correctly follow the arrows on the ever popular "Return to Terminal" sign (which I always think should actually say "Return to Terminal, Ass.").

Anyway, on my second trip around, I actually made it back without incident. I was supposed to meet Colleen under the US Airways Express sign, and there I was, yet there was no sign of her. When I called to find out where she was, she said "You're in departures, right?" Well... umm... no. Seeing as she'd just "arrived" and all, I thought "Arrivals" would be the better place to be. Apparently I was wrong.

Around I went.

On the third and final trip, I somehow managed to get her ass in the car, (not without getting some mysterious oily slime from my trunk all over my hands) and we made it home with little to no hassle. In fact, traffic on 76 was as light as I've ever seen it in my life, so someone was smiling down at us for that period. Little did I know that that was the last time this would be true for the next few days.

The rest of the night went fine, what with the heaps of salad and all. I don't really have any complaints. It's the next morning when it all went pear-shaped.

I left Colleen's at around 7:30 or so, which left me plenty of time to get to work, which is only about 35 minutes away from her. Ha.

I won't get into the details of how it all happened (because I'd be here all day) but somehow, some way, I ended up in Lansdale. Just so this means something to you, I'll included this little visual:

If you'll notice, the two places are so far apart, that they don't even show up on the same map together. I'm quite the navigator.

But fear not, it gets worse!!

I FINALLY get my shit together and end up going the right way. When my exit is the next one, I glance down and notice that I'm majorly on empty. I'm still about 2 miles from my exit, and after the exit, I've still got to drive a bit to get to my place of work. NOT going to make it. Now I'm praying and near to tears (and also well over an hour late for work at this point). Through the grace of God, I make it to my exit. Only, I don't realise that I'm going South, when I'm normally coming North, so I make my usual right off of the exit and have no clue where I am. I drive up a bit more, still not recognising anything. I do see a gas station however, and that's good enough for me.

I pull into the gas station...

And pull much too close to the pump.

Hit the pump.

Majorly dent my car.

Am I unbelievable or what?

After I sort that out (i.e., pull the car the right way, replace the nozzle that I knocked out of the holder, and thank the sweet Lord I didn't blow the place up), I realise that I'm in PA where it's self serve, and I have no idea how to pump gas. GREAT!

Just because I'm a good person and don't deserve to be FULLY screwed, I managed to find a sweet, sweet man who did it for me. And to that man, wherever you are, whoever you are, you prevented me from just bursting into tears and completely going off the deep end. So I thank you.

Anyway, after a bit more of driving in the wrong direction, completely fretting about the car (because there's an insurance issue that I also won't get into), I finally find out where I am and get going in the right direction. I pull into my work a mere 2 hours late. Hoorah.

Oh yes, I almost forgot. My boss wants me to up my productivity by 30%.

Anyway, thank God I love the people I work with. They make me laugh all day long which is good because the work itself is so tedious and boring that I'd otherwise be likely to snap at any given moment.

Let's hope that next week goes a little smoother.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

I Can't Believe I Ate the Whoooooole Thing

Today was a long, but fun day! Work went well. Everyone was in a playful mood and we laughed a lot during the day, which made it all go by faster. All days should be like that!

After work I headed over to the Philly airport to pick up Colleen. She was in Atlanta all weekend for the Eagles game, which of course takes a backseat to the fact that she met Justin Guarini at a strip club. What a lucky gal! ;-)

Anyway, I'm staying at her house tonight and going straight to work from here tomorrow. We just went and got some dinner at the Olive Garden and caught up (it's been a while). Thing is, you know those enormous bowls of salad they give you there? Well, we EACH had one. Plus breadsticks, plus our meals!! I forced myself to save some to bring as lunch tomorrow, but otherwise, it would have been shoved down my gullet like everything else. PIGS!!

Anyway, I'll have some more for you tomorrow. The usual celeb news, updates on my dog-bitten face, all that good stuff. In the meantime, I'm going to finish watching Big Brother and finish catching up with Colleen (seeing as we didn't get much catching up done at dinner since we were too busy stuffing our faces!).

Nighty night!

Monday, September 12, 2005

Bigmouth Strikes Again

So Simon bit me in the face (again) last night. I think 4 bites in 2 years is 4 bites too many, don't you?

Now I have little teeth marks by my mouth. There goes my modelling career.

Oh well. At least last time he bit me, I got to be on TV because of it!

Click here to see a REALLY shoddy "taped right off the TV" video of it.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

"Rebellion" is My Middle Name

It's well past Labor Day now and I'm wearing white pants tomorrow.

Fear me.

Disclaimer: That is not me pictured (my stomach is much flatter, of course).

LIVS Rule!

My LIVS boots came while I was away this weekend and they're every bit as hot as I thought they'd be! You can wear them in a lot of different ways and they're comfortable as hell!

I'm going to be rocking these mofos all Fall and Winter long!! Woo hoo!!

A Note to the Spammers...

For those spammers out there that have decided that the newest way to get your crap across to the public is through comments on people's blogs, I would just like you to know in advance that all your garbage is going to be deleted immediately from Marnie's World.

I've already removed the last 10 or so, and everything from here on out is history as well. Might as well not your waste your time here. Thanks!

Ashlee's Worst Night Ever Relived

Did anyone else see that NBC reran the now infamous Jude Law/Ashlee Simpson Saturday Night Live episode in its entirety last night? That's right. The jig, the tears, the excuses, all repeated for our viewing pleasure. It was awesome.

I was lucky enough to see it the first time but I still laughed out loud. It's especially fulfilling to watch her during the monologue swooning over Jude Law (as per the script) because you can tell she totally thinks she's hot shit. To know that less than 30 minutes later, it was all going to come crashing down, well... call me bitchy, but it was hot. :-)

I thought it was kind of odd that they played it in its entirety (complete with that stupid bear skit as filler when it all went pear-shaped), particularly because I thought on the night it happened, they modified it a bit for the West Coast, so it didn't look so bad. But it was bad, and we got to see it again last night.

Sorry to laugh at other people's misfortune, but in this case, I'm sure I'm not the only one!!!

Thanks NBC, for allowing me and so many others to once again enjoy the best live music mishap since "Girl you know it's, Girl you know it's, Girl you know it's..."

Foot in Mouth Syndrome: Kim Stewart Style.

For the sake of the world, Kim Stewart just needs to be quiet.

Last month, Miss Kim had to publicly apologise to Jennifer Aniston after calling her "homely" in an interview with Blender magazine. Her direct quote was:

"I like her because she's homely. She obviously has to have something else - it's not like she's gorgeous or anything"

That's right. In case you didn't get that...


Called this:



Anyway, it seems that Kim didn't learn her lesson from her last faux pas, as she's stepped in it again this week. In an effort to sound cute and funny, she told a tasteless joke about Heather Mills McCartney, wife of Paul McCartney, who tragically lost her leg in an accident in 1993. The joke?

"What has three legs and lives on a farm?"

"Paul McCartney and his wife."

Boo, Kim. Boo. Not funny.

Here's hoping that this idiot fades back into oblivion, along with her buddy Paris.

I love ya', Rod, but my GOD your oldest children need to be slapped!

We'll Always Have Paris


Everybody's favourite uber-rich pseudo-porn star Paris Hilton is quoted in this month's Vanity Fair as saying the following about her fiance, Paris Latsis:

"He's just amazing. I thought I was going to end up with some jackass."
Ahh, yes. It's just a shame he can't say the same.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Please Help

I got this in an email today. I urge anyone that can possibly help to please do so!

By now, you probably have seen on the news that pet owners had to leave their dogs behind or the dogs have been separated from their owners. Our model, Pressley and one of her friends have decided to do something for these unfortunate dogs.

In conjuction with the ASPCA, Pressley will have a dog rescue all set up. She will be looking for homes or foster homes for these dogs that will be flown to our area. I have already put my order in for another Basset Hound that may need a home. :)

If you or someone you know would be interested in adopting or fostering one of the many dogs that Pressley will bring up to NYC, please contact her. She can be reached via email at:

Thank you.

NYC, NY 10010

People are being forced to leave pets that are considered members of the family. I saw footage of one old man being rescued from a roof who was literally being pried from his dog, despite his screams. Some are even being threatened with arrest if they refuse to leave the animals behind. That is absolutely heartwrenching.

If you cannot take in a homeless animal, please make a donation, no matter how small, to one of the many organizations who are trying to help.

Here are just a few:

Humane Society Disaster Relief Fund


Petfinder Disaster Relief

Noah's Wish

MSPCA Angell

United Animal Nations

Animal Concerns


Two Cute Perros!

Just to make you smile, here's a picture of my friend Colleen's miniature pinschers, Scooter and Sammi:

For those of you who've been fans of Marnie's World for a while now (or should I say both of you?), you might recall the story of the dog with the paper clip wedged in her jaw? Well, that would be Sammi, the one in red in the front.

As you can see, she's doing just fine, and enjoying an outing to PetSmart!

Me Tired.

I know you're not used to hearing me say this, but I've been working a LOT lately. I'm hardly ever in front of the computer anymore, which is sort of blasphemous really. Today was the first day in over a week that I made it to the gym too, which is disgraceful!!

The sad thing is, all this time away and I still don't have that much to report! Let's see...

Well, for starters, I've rewarded myself for working so hard lately and went ahead and ordered those boots I adore so much. They better be just as cute in person!!! I actually was going to get these too, but they're real suede and Marnie don't play that.

(And for those of you saying to yourself, "But she has many pairs of Uggs and those are real sheepskin" I refer you here.)

What else? I also bought this, so that I can now play my Ipod in the car on my (hour and 15 minute) ride to work. This is particularly important because morning radio freaking sucks. Just jabber, jabber, jabber. Can a ho get a song? Thanks. Hopefully it works as good as they'd have you believe. I'll give a full report next time.

Now if only my EZ-Pass would just hurry up and get here, my car'd be all set!

Did a little more shopping as well. I got tons of somewhat matronly looking clothes to wear to work. It's a professional setting so I can't exactly come in looking like the Queen of Trend that I normally am (insert tongue in cheek). Oh well. I guess I can deal with looking frumpy for 10 hours a day. I'll just have to step it up on the weekends. :-)

I almost forgot! I bought this too:

I've wanted that forever, but now I actually have a place to pack a lunch for and use it!

Tomorrow I'm heading down the shore again with my sister and her kiddies after work. According to weather reports, things are looking up, unlike last time!! Keep your fingers crossed!!

Anyway, I'm beat and I still have to pack and all that jazz. See ya' Sunday!

Monday, September 05, 2005


I told you she was going to be able to fit in her own bag soon!!!

Hil, it's not too late. I have a little something for you, k?

Age Before Beauty?

You know, it's pretty bad when you can barely tell the difference between 19 year-old Lindsay Lohan and 54 year-old Faye Dunaway.

What exactly is going on with Lindsay in this picture? Is that collagen in her lips? And for the love of God, WHAT is she wearing?


In the rare event that the hilarity factor here at Marnie's World isn't enough for you, I'd like to direct you to Flicstix, the blog of my hilarious, beautiful friend from across the pond, Felicity.

Fliss is essentially the UK's version of me (the perfect person to hold them over until I can get my permanent residency) so if you enjoy this site at all, I think you'll find hers quite funny as well. If you don't enjoy this site, then sod ya'. What are you doing here?

I didn't get this picture out of a magazine, by the way. That's Felicity, from when we got to be models for a day in London. Vain cows!!

Click here to see how our vanity once caused us to look like pumpkins!

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child

In Stewart News...

Rod looks ridiculously tiny next to his soon-to-be third wife, Penny. Let's hope their new baby gets her tall genes!

And speaking of Stewart offspring, I never realized how much Rod's son Sean actually looks like a slightly chubbier, more haggard version of my friend Stu.

Just sayin.

My Phatty Ride!!!

Got a car today! I won't be able to get all the paperwork sorted to officially get it on the road until next week (damn the holidays!), so I'll still be using my cousin's Acura for a bit longer. In the meantime, my car is sitting in my driveway looking cute. In fact, it looks just like this:

It looks good and runs good and all that stuff. I'm excited about it.

Want to hear the best part though?

Kelley Blue Book Suggested Retail Value: $5,045
My price: $500

You read that correctly. $500.

PAID IN FULL, baby. No monthly car payments here!! I couldn't be happier!!

Many, MANY thanks to Sheila and Courtney!!! You've made my day!

K-Stew Has a Message For the World!

Hmm... who do you think Kim is sending this message to via her footwear?

An ex? Her dad? Trent?

The world may never know.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Buffy the Catnip Slayer

Introducing the adorable "Buffy", my best bud Michelle's new kitten!!

Buffy happens to be a boy, but that doesn't mean that he can't have a perfectly immasculating, vampire slaying name!

Adorable, huh?

According to Michelle:

“His” name is Buffy although I’m pretty sure “he” will be referred to as “she” b/c my parents can’t seem to get it out of their heads. Anyway, Buffy (I don’t like that name either, but it’s not technically my cat) is SO cute – just look at the pics!

I'd have to agree! That is one cute cat!!! I look forward to meeting you, Buffy!!

Celebrity Toothpicks

What's wrong with this picture?

Nicole Richie's thigh is the size of Mischa Barton's calves. Despite what I sometimes say, Mischa is one skinny biotch so that is just crazy.

Like Clay in His Hands

So... I went to see Clay Aiken last night. Is it wrong that I nearly burst into tears during his rendition of Barry Manilow's "Mandy"?

(No, really. I was moved to tears for Christ's sake!! Damn you, Clay!!).

I know I'm biased because I plan on bearing his children one day and all, but this was seriously one of the best shows I've been to ever. (Even better than this made it look!)

It was a "jukebox" theme, so rather than doing all of his songs and calling it a night, my boy went on for THREE HOURS singing songs from the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80''s, 90's, and today. There were costume changes aplenty, and his 3 backup singers sang a few solos (which I was annoyed about at first, but they really earned their keep and grew on me!). It was actually more like a "show" than a "concert." It was also the only concert I've ever been to that had a 20 minute intermission!

He sang SO many good songs. I searched everywhere for a setlist, but to no avail. It was something like 100 songs though (many in medley form, but still). He sang "When Doves Cry" for God's sake!

Hot, right?

No? Okay. Well... then fine. More for me.

Anyway, I couldn't even begin to pick a fave of the night, but I will say that he TORE IT UP with "Suspicious Minds" by Elvis, And, of course, being the self proclaimed "Queen of the 80's" I was going NUTS during that whole portion. Rick Astley? Christopher Cross? Lionel Richie? PRINCE? All in one night? That's what I'm talking about. I probably went the most nuts during "Invisible" though. It was a Clay Aiken concert after all. I was totally rocking out during that one. No shame here. ;-)

His new songs were SOO good too!! Everyone had glow sticks during them and they were moving them in unison. I cannot wait to get that CD! I was probably one of the youngest people there, but it was still a pretty damn good crowd!! I couldn't have found a nicer person to sit next to either!! She even found two empty seats in the front row and cared enough to come back and get me! Our seats were only 4 rows back, but it was still that much better! Shout out to Marie!

There was tons of interaction with the audience and my boy was funny and witty. I would start quoting stuff, but I fear it'd all end with me laughing alone and saying "You had to be there."

Anyway say what you want... but Clay's voice is amazing. He's one of the only artists that actually makes me weak in the knees when he sings.

If that makes me sound juvenile, so be it. :-)

On the way out, I noticed a parked car had the license plate "CLAY AKIN" and a stick that said "fan" next to it. I was going to take a pic, but I would have lost my spot in the taxi line. It was funny though. :-)

Anyway, that's my review. Pictures (God willing) will be coming soon. I know you can hardly wait. :-)

And I think you'll all be happy to know that in all my ridiculousness, I still never got this... even if it IS "great for managing allowances"! I still have my dignity.

Well... some of it.