Marnie's World

Welcome to the Most Ridiculous Thing I've Ever Seen

2009-08-02T12:21:00.003-04:00

Honestly, people.

PYT on the L

2009-06-28T01:05:00.003-04:00

There are quite a few things that make this video amazing.

1. Say what you want about Michael, his music can clearly bring people together like no other.
2. The L train was my train while I lived in Brooklyn. *sheds tear*
3. Dude in the blue polo is WORKING it.

RIP, Michael.

RIP to Three Legends

2009-06-25T18:19:00.002-04:00

My childhood wouldn't have been the same without you guys. Rest in Peace.

When I Grow Up... I'll Eat in Catering.

2009-06-25T12:28:00.007-04:00

Hmm. I just read an article wherein Nicole Scherzinger of the Pussycat Dolls said she, nor the other dolls, ever saw Britney during the first leg of the Circus tour. "Not once".

She chalks it up to different schedules, and the article seems to blame it on Britney's "protective detail."

Funny thing is, I was a half-step up from a NOBODY on the tour and I saw Britney many times! She often ate in catering with us peons, and her dressing room door was open all the time. In fact, I often saw the other Pussycat Dolls in catering as well. Very often, in fact.

You know who I never saw eating in catering with the peons? Nicole Scherzinger.

"Not once."

I saw her in Boston leaving the venue right before Britney went on, and she didn't even make eye contact with anyone. I'm not saying Nicole is a bitch or anything (in fact, I found her to be quite charming in her "What Do You Think Of..." segment with Keane). However, I'm also quite certain Britney's "protective detail" didn't keep the Pussycat Dolls away from her, and think it's unfair to call Britney a "no show". If Nicole wanted to see Britney, she could have sauntered down to catering like the rest of us and there she'd have been.

Just sayin'.

Our Lives Would Suck Without Kelly

2009-06-23T12:19:00.001-04:00

I defy anyone to watch this interview with Kelly Clarkson and not love her.

Tweetle-Dee-Dee

2009-06-02T17:57:00.003-04:00

I said I'd never do it, but clearly I'm a dirty liar.

I've officially jumped on the Twitter bandwagon.

All Eyes On Me In The Center Of The Ring Just Like a Circus...

2009-06-02T13:35:00.015-04:00

After having spent nearly two and a half months traveling with The Circus Starring Britney Spears, I can safely say that the whole experience can be divided into 3 Categories...

The Good...

The Bad...

And the Ugly...

Bonus Categories:

The Drunk...

The Hilarious...

And the Probably Illegal...

No juicy stories for you though, folks. The 10,000 pages of confidentiality agreements I had to sign will see to that!

More from London next week!!

Stuff and Things and Such

2009-03-30T15:59:00.004-04:00

Well, hello there. We meet again.

For the last month and a half, a lot of people have been asking why the hell I haven't posted anything about our trip to England for the latest Keane mini tour. I considered it, but aside from being ridiculously busy (which I'll get to in a minute -- you've heard "I'm busy" before, but this is just on a whole new level), I figured after December's ramblings, no one wanted to scroll through 100 more sweaty pictures of Tom Chaplin, nor did they want to read the gushing text that usually accompanies it.

For the record, aside from a spell of sickness during the last few days, we had an AMAZING time. Keane was in top form, and it was incredible to see them in such huge venues. I could go on and on and on, but I won't. We've got 11 or 12 North American shows coming up in May anyway, so be assured you'll hear all about those! Suffice it to say it was worth the trip, and mucho thanks to Tony for being amazing and making it all happen.

Loves it!!

Moving on, you all kind of won't believe where I am right now, and where I've been for the last few weeks, but I'll tell you anyway...

I, Marnie, am currently out on the road with Miss Britney Spears and her Circus Tour!

No, seriously. Pretty amazing right?

I kept meaning to write about it before I left, but it all came about really suddenly. I challenge anyone to try to prepare for something like that (you should have seen me trying to pack!), while simultaneously moving house, and try to find a spare moment in the day!

Anyway, my latest disappearing act is mostly due to 20 hour days that end with me crashing out in my bunk on the tour bus to head to the next city. I've pretty much temporarily neglected everything else in my life, so blogging's kind of the last thing on my mind! I'm out on the road until the first week of May, and then only home for a few days before getting back on the road to follow Keane around (without the luxury of a tour bus to cart my sleeping ass around!!) so when my life has calmed down and gotten back to normal (if my life can ever be considered "normal"), I'm sure I'll have some fun tales to tell!

Now, off to find out what day it is and what city I'm in before passing the hell out.

This is the life.

An Artistic Representation of What Was Just In My Apartment

2009-02-03T11:34:00.003-05:00

All that was missing was the robe.

How Long Do You Think Before PETA's All Over This One?

2009-01-28T14:38:00.004-05:00

"Nothing but some mom jeans on...
I never felt so beautiful, baby as I do now..."

Go veg.

The Best Part of the Story Is That Her Name is "Tangernika"...

2009-01-03T02:30:00.009-05:00

Michigan Twins Born in Different Years

Tangernika Woods of Michigan gave birth to one of her twin boys in 2008 and the other in 2009.

ROCHESTER, Mich. (Jan. 2) - They're twins, all right, despite what their spanking new birth certificates say. Tariq Griffin entered the world at 12:17 a.m. on New Year's Day at Crittenton Hospital in Rochester, Mich. Twin brother Tarrance was born a bit earlier — 26 minutes to be exact.

That means the boys have the unique distinction of having been born on different days, months and years.

Their dad, Tarrance Sr., is also a twin. The parents say the boys are doing well, which is their main concern. (AP)

Wishes for 2009

2009-01-01T20:36:00.004-05:00

In this day full of resolutions and hopes of bettering oneself, I figured I'd give you a break from all that and instead write a shameless plug for my friend's adorable idea!

Wish Lockets

So if you're like me and have trouble keeping all of those New Year's resolutions on your own, maybe a Wish Locket is just what you need. :-)

It's a super cute idea and makes a great gift. They have tons of designs and can even personalize it for you. Check it out!

For those of you on Facebook, you can become a fan here.

What have you go to lose?

Happy New Year everyone!

Holy Shit.

2008-12-30T23:39:00.005-05:00

"A-MAZ-ing!" *sing-song*

First this, now this??

At this rate, someone's going to be paying us to go to England in February. Life is good.

Christmas Cuteness '08

2008-12-25T16:09:00.004-05:00

As he always does, Simon had a very good Christmas. As soon as I came downstairs carrying an armful of gifts, his tail immediately started wagging. He was ready!

"Can we start?"

He started by opening his 'Marley and Me' duck, care of my brother.

He quickly began blowing through the others with reckless abandon.

I swear it's like having a toddler. An 11 year-old, hairy toddler.

It didn't end there. Later on in the evening, my brother's girlfriend, Mare, stopped by with yet another toy for him to open. He was happy to oblige.

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas (or whatever holiday you choose to celebrate) and that you got everything you wanted.

Even if it wasn't a cool 'Marley and Me' duck.

Best Mugshot EVER?

2008-12-19T14:24:00.004-05:00

I think so.

Udderly hilarious.

Nothing 'Better Than This'

2008-12-08T23:28:00.054-05:00

At this very moment, I'm sitting on a plane, heading back to New York from what was one of the most amazing times I’ve had in ages. Of course, by the time I actually get around to posting this, I'll have long since disembarked, but surely you've come to expect that kind of procrastination from me by now. Anyway...

As I've mentioned on this site approximately 50 billion times (give or take), my much-loved Keane has recently put out a ridiculously good album. Naturally, I immediately began salivating at the idea of a tour to promote that puppy (as any normal person does) and waited what seemed like ages to hear anything. After Tony told me that their original plans to be around these parts in October was scrapped, and that we were likely looking at a May/June sort of time frame, I knew I couldn't wait, so I got on the phone with Kat (my "Keanedred Spirit" as I've so dorkily put it in the past) and insisted that we book a trip to the UK in February for some of that Chaplin/Rice-Oxley/Hughes (and now, Quin) goodness. I had posed the idea to her before and she was hesitant, but once she heard how long we'd have to wait otherwise, she was game.

So, the week before last, I booked us a trip with an admittedly ridiculous amount of shows and sorted out all of our hotels and transportation and we were set. Woo hoo!

Well, I kid you not, literally minutes after this was finished, I find out that the band has decided to come to America to do both an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel, as well as an intimate show at the Echo in Los Angeles. We’re talking 350 people here folks. Had it just been Kimmel, I’d never have thought twice, but when, I thought, am I EVER going to get to see Keane with only 350 people? Certainly not in England. Plus, in a twist of fate, Kat actually moved to LA a few months ago, which to me was a higher power’s way of telling me I’d better get my ass there. (What?) So… we sorted our tickets and once again I found myself booking a flight. As if life wasn’t awesome enough, shortly thereafter, they announced not one, but TWO MORE intimate shows, also in LA. A 500 person gig at the Roxy, and… get this… a 280 person ACOUSTIC gig at the Largo.

Two words -- DONE and DONE.

One six-hour flight later, (with Kevin Connolly from Entourage, no less) I found myself in LA, and less than 24 hours after that, we were in line for the Kimmel taping. After the proverbial roasting I took last year from some random gals on an unofficial Keane forum (I guess that’s what I get for checking site stats to figure out how people find their way here), I was admittedly dreading standing in line with some of these people. Thankfully we met some really fantastic fans who made the time go by quickly. Shout out to our girls!.

(Did I just say “Shout out?”. Jesus)

New friend Amanda, in particular, made me die with laughter when, during the sound check, Kat commented how Tom Chaplin seemed to be giving "a little something extra." Amanda replied, complete with a deadpan expression, “Tom knows the bitches want it.”

Hi-lar-i-ous. In fact, that was almost the title of this post.

Anyway, the taping was a bit short, but totally great and well worth it, despite lots of waiting around, unexpectedly cold weather, and douchey line-cutters. It really got us pumped for the upcoming shows. We weren't allowed to have cameras, but the lovely Annie balked at the rules and got some decent cell phone pics, which she has very kindly allowed me to post here for your viewing pleasure.

Tim kind of does weird shit when he's performing.

*stomp*

*scratch*

Oh, hai.

*scratch again*

*clap*

*dribble*

*pout*

*tune*

*conduct*

*nap*

And that was that.

In yet another minor lapse of sanity, Kat and I decided to once again brave the lines at the Echo the following day. We told ourselves we’d never subject ourselves to that madness again, but my desire to actually be able to see anything but the back of other peoples' necks, far outweighed our good judgment. Thankfully, we met quite a few more fun new people, as well as some we met on the last tour, and they made the time go by pretty quickly. Oh, and by "time" I mean "11 hours." Totes ridic. Thank God the day ended up being pretty decent. Once again, Annie and our old friend Shar were nice enough to allow me the use of their photos for you to sigh at. If you're interested, most of them click to bigger versions.

Le Venue (photo by Annie)

Fabulous Sivan and Annie. And look at me back there. Even in candid shots, I always manage to look like a jackass. (photo by Annie)

So yeah, it wasn't so bad. Of course, there was that one incident where Kat almost fist-fought this arrogant guy (who, throughout the week, ultimately earned himself the title of Douchiest of the aforementioned Douchey line-cutters) but thankfully her reasoning (and by "reasoning" I mean "stink-eye"), as well as the angry mob of women behind her, forced him to the back where he belonged. I’m sitting here on my flight right now, laughing out loud about how out of hand the whole thing almost got, but it certainly worked itself out in the end. Thank f**k.

By nightfall, Kat and I were about to burst, but we hid it well.

"Yay! We're so happy! Not a line cutter to be seen!" Oh, wait.

Once inside, we readied ourselves by smashing our bodies against the stage and totally cheated by looking at the setlist.

F**k yeah. (photo by Shar)

While we waited, Annie took a few pictures of us farting around.

"B-b-b-Broadway!"

But, before long, the magic began.

The show was AMAZING as usual but, like Kimmel, a bit short. As you can see in Annie's pics though, our spot was prime, right between Tom and Tim, jammed up against the stage. I had to dodge a guitar-to-the-forehead a few times, and I could have done without the knee to the chest and wingtip to the crotch, but I wanted an intimate show, right? I certainly got one! Fabulous.

Almost as fabulous as Tim’s shoes.

Kat and I were dumb enough to listen to the "No cameras or recording devices of any kind" sign outside the venue and like the sheep we are, we put our stuff back in the car. Of course once we were in, it was a photo taking free-for-all. Damn you, fake rules!! *shakes fist at sky* Thankfully, Annie's camera clicked away diligently in the absence of ours. Enjoy.

Hello boys! Tim's shirt was clearly as rad as his shoes.

God, I waited a year and a half for this shizz.

It's always weird when you're close enough to see their imperfections.

"What imperfections?!" I hear you cry. I know, I know.

Tim is FEELING IT.

Tom, is that a mic in your hand or are... oh wait... yeah, it's just a mic.

The token shot of Richard. :-) This was like the one show we'd been to where he was actually visible.

Jesse "New Guy" Quin, whose arms I never noticed were so damn skinny!

Oh look, my arm leaning on the speaker. I can tell from the bad fake tan on the elbow.

Oh and there's me again, laughing with/at either Richard or Adam from the crew... or both.

Raise your hand, raise your hand if you're SURE!

Diesel, eh Tom?

Jesse can bang sticks together with the best of 'em.

NOW what am I doing?

I do believe Annie now owns this water bottle. That's something I would know nothing about. :-)

AGAIN, I'm ignoring Tom and acting as if someone was doing a stand-up routine at the back of the stage. WHAT was so funny?

Oh, NOW someone's paying attention! Looks like I was so engrossed at this point, I missed the tighty-whitey action. Someone really likes Diesel.

Also why am I picking my ear?

*sigh*

*sigh again*

At the end of the show I, admittedly, had a bit of an embarrassing scuffle over a drumstick, but Richard was giving it to me, damn it. :-) I won’t mention any names, but one crew member stood laughing and imitating me nearly brawling over this thing, which was the embarrassing part. Ironically, he was the same crew member that later confirmed that I’m not crazy and they were, in fact, intended for me so that was satisfying. :-) I gave one to Kat, of course, and someone threw me a towel (I don’t know if it was Richard’s or Tim’s), and we were on our way. We toyed with waiting for the band to be done with their little Interscope party so we could get the drumsticks signed (a la Portland last year) but we decided against it. We’d done enough waiting, after all, and there was to be plenty more. These days, the shows are kind of enough for us.

Well, and plus, who am I trying to kid? We're going to see them probably close to 30 more times in the next 6 months so we didn't mind laying low this time around. We were actually kind of proud of ourselves. Particularly when Annie commented, "Wow. You didn't even flinch when Jesse walked by." I know, right? What's happened to me? I must be maturing!

Oh no, wait. That's not the case at all.

Mature? Nope. Scary? Absolutely.

On a completely unrelated note, Zach Braff, who seems to be at a shitload of Keane gigs, was parked in front of us and drives like a complete maniac. So there you go.

So Friday comes along, and once again we find ourselves chilling on the Sunset Blvd sidewalk, waiting for yet another show.

(photo by Shar)

The weather was way nicer than the day before, and there was tons of places to eat and pee (hooray!) so it was an infinitely more pleasurable experience. We really got lucky with being surrounded by the coolest people in line both days. Of course, Pompous McDoWhatIWant and the fam showed up minutes before doors and took a place at the front of line, but there was no use in fighting it. No need for us to get worked up two nights in a row, right? Plus, you know what they say about karma.

(photo by Shar)

(photo by Shar)

We ended up in a great spot at the stage again, so it was pretty sweet. Drunken, wine-spilling, camera-swinging fans provided the entertainment while we waited. Watching security shine a flashlight to make sure they didn’t need to be taken out was only an extra added bonus. :-)

(photo by Shar)

Other ways to pass the time included salivating at the setlist which, this time, thankfully included my beloved Black Burning Heart...

(photo by Shar)

And wondering what the hell these little talismans on top of the speaker were...

From left: A Barbie, A man on a bike, a Pegasus, and a cow on a double-decker bus. (photo by Shar)

Hmm... Nothing strange about that at all.

Also amusing was Jesse's guitar...

"Jesse is a giant sexy pants who sucks at catching." (photo by Shar)

Thankfully, both Kat and Shar were maniacally taking photos during the show itself, so here’s some for you to enjoy.

(All photos by Kat unless otherwise stated. Please do not use without permission)

(photo by Shar)

Once again, Tim shoes he knows good footwear.

(photo by Shar)

I kind of love this one.

Peeking at the setlist.

Remember awesome Amanda of "Tom knows the bitches want it" fame? Well that's her rocking out and being awesome on the far right.

I love when Tim totally gets into it.

This might be my favorite of the bunch.

Love it.

Richard looks like someone just beat the shit out of him. (photo by Shar)

Kickin' it.

After the show, we once again skipped out on waiting for the band, and instead went for some drinks with some new crew friends. We had an amazing time, and I don’t think I’ve stopped laughing about some of the shit since. Suffice it to say I’ll never look at Noel Gallagher the same way.

On Saturday, we did a whole lot of nothing, which was exactly what we needed. My body was in such a state, you’d have thought that I was the one who’d been performing the past three nights! Sometimes you just need a day doing nothing but chilling with Foxy Brown…

And Sunday, we were on again. This was the show we were most excited about. We got to the venue around 11, but no one was there (which was totally weird – we assumed someone from the venue had chased people away) so we went for breakfast and for a little shopping and came back at 2pm where some of our friends from the days before were waiting. Once again, Cutting Crew (not to be confused with the delightful 80’s band of the same name) showed up and tried to pull yet another fast one, but thankfully everyone in the line was totally sick of it, held their rightful places in line, and ended up where they belonged. Hopefully between now and the next batch of shows, they’ll learn a thing or two about etiquette. I can assure you that the days of Kat and I waiting in those lines are OVER, but it’s not about us. It’s about not being a douche. I hate to overuse the word douche, but really. Anyway, that’s the last you’ll hear about them, because this is when the magic happened. That other magic that happened earlier in this post can't even compare.

The Largo is a TINY venue, much smaller than an average movie theatre, and we were really looking forward to hearing an acoustic show. What we got was beyond anything I could have hoped for in my wildest dreams.

The lights went down, and Tom came strutting from the back of the room, down the aisle, alone with just a guitar. He didn’t even go up on stage. He stood at the front, smiled, started strumming away at the guitar and, without a mic, started belting out the FROG PRINCE!!!!!!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Enter the tears.

I had just said to Kat the day before that my biggest regret about last year was that we missed the West Coast shows when they performed that song. Since they’re promoting a whole new album we thought we’d missed our chance to ever see it live. Seeing it like that, with nothing but Tom and a guitar, in a completely silent room, was like the second coming. I was completely speechless, mouth agape, and had no control over the tears welling in my eyes. It was phenomenal.

There was an insanely strict no-camera policy, but I think I can say with certainty that no could EVER, EVER do justice to what it was like actually being there.

The show could have ended right there for me and it still would have all been worth it. (Hell, the WORLD could have ended right then and I'd have probably been all, "Whatevs. Still worth it.")

Tom then went to the stage, still alone, for one of my new faves, Again and Again, joking that this part of the show with just us and him was “the best bit.” Soon he was joined by the others and all I can say is that it was epic. Hands down the greatest thing I have ever seen in my life. To think that I’d debated, even for a second, not changing my flight to be able to stay for that one, almost makes me nauseous. Had I missed that, I’m not sure I’d have forgiven myself. I don’t know that we’ll ever get an opportunity like that again and I am SO grateful to have been there.

Musical genius Jon Brion joined them on stage for a few songs, and there was a funny little Q and A session before they announced that it was the last song. Someone yelled “Bullshit!!” from the back of the room, which was funnier than I can probably convey here.

When they came back for the encore, Tom told the crowd that, while it wasn't on their list, they were used to playing Try Again acoustically, so they were going to give it a go. If someone had asked me, that would have been my number choice of songs from the last album to hear, so once again I was like a pig in shit. Unfortunately, I was an overly emotional pig in shit as, halfway through the song, I COMPLETELY lost it. Sure, I welled up at the sheer brilliance of Frog Prince, but this was not welling. This was full-on shoulder-shaking, tears-streaming-down-the-face sobs. It was so bad, Kat actually thought there was something wrong with me! The worst was, I never regained control, and continued on like that throughout the finale of Perfect Symmetry. Embarrassing, to say the least, but I just couldn’t help it. It was the most beautiful live performance I’ve ever seen, and likely ever will see. I was reduced to a quivering heap and if I had it to do over again, I don’t think things would be any different.

“Tom’s so cute!” “Tim’s so hot!”-style nonsense aside, this band is seriously one of the most talented bands EVER. Each one is just SO good at what they do, and Tom Chaplin’s voice makes me weak in the knees. I think with that show, they would have won over any non-believers, for sure. I might as well shut up about it because there’s no way I can ever do any of it justice. I’ve never been moved like that from a live show. I could almost cry just thinking of it now! Pure unadulterated musical genius. I LOVE it.

Anyway, when all was said and done, Kat and said our goodbyes to all of our new friends and went and had a few more drinks to bring it all home. The next morning I flew back home (which is when I wrote everything above this paragraph) and now I sit in the reality of my living room, after hours (days really) of choosing and cropping photos and linking to all the random things you've read here, mostly just counting the seconds until our England trip. If we thought we were excited before, it's nothing compared to how we feel now. It's going to be awesome.

God, I LOVE Keane.

But I haven't told you anything that you didn't already know. :-)

(Yes, I went there).

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T11:08:00.001-05:00

Hey You, Big Fat Pig

2008-11-11T22:24:00.007-05:00

In my most recent blog post, I discussed Morrissey's song, "America is Not the World", theorizing that, now that Obama has been elected president, Moz kind of had to eat his words:

"In America, The land of the free, they said
And of opportunity, In a just and a truthful way.
But where the president is never black, female or gay
and until that day
you've got nothing to say to me to help me believe"

Of course, I also surmised that, As an Obama supporter himself, Morrissey would be quite happy either way.

Speaking of eating words, and well, eating in general, for the second time in a week, I saw something that made me think of the lyrics to that song.

I had surgery last week, so I've been laid up, and watching even more TV than usual (I know). Today I saw a commercial for something totally ridiculous. Even more ridiculous than Bratz Dolls.

It was this:

Yes, that's right. The KFC "Fully Loaded Box Meal" sponsored by Guitar Hero World Tour.

In an understatement of the year, the slogan for this box-o-slop is "Man, That's a Lot of Food".

Ya think?

The box contains the following:

1 KFC Snacker sandwich
1 Leg or Thigh (your choice)
2 Crispy Strips
2 Sides (shown are the Mac and Cheese and Potato wedges)
1 Biscuit
1 Drink

ONE DRINK, folks. That means this monstrosity is indeed only meant for one person.

Seriously, Colonel?

To add insult to greasy, calorie-laden injury, it's sponsored by Guitar Hero (even comes with a coupon for the game), which means they're encouraging you not only to gorge yourself on this nonsense, but afterwards you can sit your obese ass down and give those fingers a great work out! It's this mentality that makes me insane.

It's also the mentality that caused Morrissey to write these further lyrics from "America Is Not the World":

"America, your belly's too big"

" In America, it brought you the hamburger.
Well America, you know where,
you can shove your hamburger.
And don't you wonder, why in Estonia they say,
Hey you, big fat pig! You fat pig, you fat pig"

Sure, I'm a huge Morrissey fan AND a vegetarian so I could be biased against KFC in general. But I'll also tell you that you'd NEVER find such a meal for sale at a KFC in the UK. And why should you? It's nasty.

In my search to find out what exactly came with that food-induced coma waiting to happen, I stumbled upon yet another gem on the KFC website.

Not to be confused with the "Fully Loaded Box Meal" this equally over the top option is the "Variety Big Box Meal". Rather than give a bulleted list, I'll just copy, verbatim, the promotional blurb for this mess directly from the website:

"Hungry for all of your KFC favorites and can’t pick just one? Now you don’t have to. Your rumbling stomach doesn’t stand a chance against our new Variety Big Box Meal, which includes a drumstick, a Crispy Strip, an individual box of Popcorn Chicken, two Homestyle sides, a biscuit and a refreshing 32-oz. drink. Fill up on all your favorites! (Subject to availability)"

Subject to availability, Gluttons! Your rumbling stomach doesn't stand a chance, but unfortunately neither do your arteries.

Vegetarianism aside, I just don't get it. If someone really wanted to go all out and treat themselves to something like this, surely the least we can do as a society is force them to order the items individually? Why make it easy for us to kill ourselves? Instead we reward it with a coupon for a video game. GAAAHHH.

Sure, you might argue that, on the flip side, the Wii Fit is sold out everywhere, but I'd really like to know how many of those get used on a regular basis, or have even come out of their boxes.

I also wonder if Morrissey has one.

Are Lyrics Vegetarian?

2008-11-05T00:53:00.009-05:00

Morrissey's song "America Is Not the World" from his (completely amazing) 2004 CD, You Are the Quarry, contains the following lyrics:

"In America, The land of the free, they said
And of opportunity, In a just and a truthful way.
But where the president is never black, female or gay
and until that day
you've got nothing to say to me to help me believe"

Of course, that same song also contains the lyrics "You know where you can shove your hamburger" but that's beside the point. The point is, I suppose Moz will be eating those words about now.

And I'm sure he's happy to do so.

(Of course, that looks more like Obama and Joaquin Phoenix, but whatevs)

Epic

2008-11-04T21:47:00.002-05:00

Cruising into Halloween

2008-11-01T13:49:00.009-04:00

And so another Halloween has come and gone.

This year's festivities were decidedly less eventful than the past few years. We kept it low key for sure. As such, rather than take weeks to write up some epic novel about the night's activities in excessive detail, I've decided to do a simple photo comparison post. (We know how I love my photo comparisons!!).

After all, a picture is worth a thousand words, right? Well, I'm pretty sure that doubles when you're in costume.*

So, I still haven't told you what we decided to go as. I'll ease you into it by giving you a hint.

That's me on the left. If you're a big blog reader or TMZ-watcher, you'll know who that is on the right. You'll also know that those shoes were pretty much the most important part of my costume.

Still no? Well, here we go...

(Click images for larger versions)

One big happy (batshit crazy) Scientology-loving family!

CRUISEAZY!!!

Happy Halloween! See you next year!

*I have no idea.

Happy Halloween!!!!

2008-10-31T11:41:00.000-04:00

Gwen Stefani Reads This Blog

2008-10-28T23:31:00.004-04:00

She totally doesn't by the way.

Last year, in my annual Halloween post, I joked that Matt and I decided to put together some sort of duo costume, and I showed this picture:

Of course it was a joke and we opted instead to glam it up as David and Victoria Beckham.

However, the Bacon and Egg idea did not go to waste! It's not even officially Halloween yet, and already those costumes were utilized this year by one Miss Gwen Stefani and her husband, Gavin Rossdale -- a fact which I find hilarious.

Of course, Gavin was far too cool to actually put his on until it was absolutely necessary, but I still totes love the fact that they rocked these costumes that anyone could pick up at their local Halloween Adventure!! Seal and Heidi Klum, they are not!

Speaking of Heidi Klum, for the last 2 months or so, Matt and I had totally planned on being her and Tim Gunn for Halloween this year. We were having trouble coming up with something that would work as well as our Beckham costumes, and that was the best we could come up with. We toyed around with being Lindsay and Samantha, but then we decided that it might just end up looking like us on any given night!

(Well, but for the fact that, while I've had my ups and downs, even I apply fake tanner better than the mess that is Lindsay Lohan! I mean, not to go off on a tangent, but behold:

SERIOUSLY, Lindsay? You thought that was okay? You look like you have socks and kneepads on! And why have I read a half billion times how you've been axed from Ugly Betty, but no one ever really talked about this tragedy? But I digress.)

So yeah, we nixed that idea pretty early on and moved on to Heidi and Tim. I liked the idea in theory (it was actually mine to begin with) but not only wasn't I sure if people would know what we were, but I was also having trouble coming to terms with the inevitable ass and thigh comparisons that would have been going on all night. After all, Heidi Klum, I am not.

So, while I thought it could ultimately work, particularly if I carried this doll, I was never that excited about it, and I want to be excited about Halloween.

The other night, while catching up on the celebrity blogs, I had an idea that I thought could work MUCH better. I thought we'd be a lot more recognizable, for one thing, and it would also allow us to include another one of our friends in the idea. Matt was totally down with it, and we started on it right away.

Of course I'm not going to tell you what it is. You've only got a few more days, and if all goes according to plan, it just might be worth the wait!

In the meantime, you can read the previous Halloween posts to kill time. :-)

Spooktacular
Spooktacular II
Halloweekend

Oh, and of course, look at the pet costumes here. So fabulous!

This Makes Me Extremely Happy

2008-10-28T10:59:00.004-04:00

Especially after this.

Go Simon(s)... It's Ya Birfday...

2008-10-27T20:33:00.005-04:00

My baby turns 11 years old today!!!

Happy Birthday Simon!!!! Here's hoping you're around for another 11 years!

In a related story...

Namesake Simon LeBon celebrates a birthday today as well, turning a ripe 50 years old.

So in dog years, he's 350. In Duran years, he's about 18.

Head Over Heels with Laughter

2008-10-16T10:40:00.001-04:00

McNeato strikes again!

Completely Random But Also Completely Fabulous

2008-10-14T21:56:00.005-04:00

Yesterday, a very nice commenter alerted me to something unlikely but pretty freaking cool in my own little world.

Go to Google and search: Tim Rice Oxley (no dashes, no quotes).

Click the Images tab.

Peep the very first image.

Hell yes.

edit: Sometimes it's second for some reason.

I Can Haz Update?

2008-10-14T19:34:00.005-04:00

Well, here I sit on this fine October evening, finding myself with some true free time for the first time in a while. Of course, by "free time" I mean "I have so much work-related stuff I could be doing but choose to procrastinate instead" but I personally can't think of a better time to catch my faithful readers (yes, both of you!) up on the latest in El Mundo de Marnie.

As we all know, I haven't been particularly good at posting for a while now. (Some would argue I was never particularly good at posting, but I've been decidedly less frequent in the last year). So let's catch up, shall we?

First off, I'm a Brooklynite now. After my London plans went the way of Amy Winehouse's liver, I decided to make the move to New York with Matt and so far so good. I managed to fracture a toe on my first week here, fainted and almost give myself a concussion on week 2, and by week 5 I was lucky enough to meet the world's CREEPIEST guy in a midtown subway station, but so far Matt and I haven't killed eachother and the good has far outweighed the bad.

We've had a few good nights out. You know the kind.

If I wasn't so lazy I might Photoshop that visible bra out of the shot, but I am so I won't. And anyway, it's classy.

Last week I had Simon up here with me, and we frequented the various dog runs of the city. I think he's decided that Cooper Park in East Williamsburg is his fave.

On our first trip there he played the shy "I'm just gonna sit on your lap and watch" act at first...

But then he seemed to really take to little Harper the pug...

As well as another Simon...

Before coming home and passing the hell out.

The next day we went to Tompkins Square Park to relive our weekend from last year, but he wasn't having it. He just wanted to stare at the big dogs and have me tell the little dogs leave him alone.

Before long he started frantically scratching my purse, prompting me to wonder if I had some old treats in there or something, before realizing he actually just wanted his leash! We were out.

We went and dined at Sidewalk Cafe where, for the first and last time in his life, Simon was used as an example for good behavior. Another woman's dog was misbehaving and she was told to put him on the other side of the barrier. She angrily pointed at Simon and said "That dog's on this side of the barrier" when the waiter issued the verbal smackdown, "That dog's not bothering anyone!". Zing!

Once we got home Simon made himself comfortable...

And *suprise!* passed out again.

On days when the dog runs got to be too much for him, we just chilled in our backyard, which I think he liked almost as much...

And that pretty much sums up our week. I was so sad to see him go though. Aside from our week-long dog-owner bonding sesh, sending him home has certainly stifled my burgeoning New York social life. I met more normal, fun people in 7 days of dog runs than I have in any human-oriented situation in ages!

Sadder still, is the fact that I really don't have that much more to update you on! While I've certainly been busy, the vast majority of it has been boring work stuff that's hardly worth doing, much less writing about.

Mind you, that will change in the coming months!

My beloved Keane, as you know, have just released their fabulous new album and of course, will be touring in support of it. We had the time of our lives last year on our mini tour, so after much thought (read: no thought at all) Kat and I decided that we would be remiss and borderline blasphemous if we didn't attend each and every North American show this time around.

And well, it's actually very likely that we'll hit up much of the UK tour as well. Insane? Certainly. But I personally can't think of a better way to spend my birthday than dancing around like an idiot and singing along with my less than stellar voice at the Echo Arena in Liverpool. I just warned Tony yesterday that he and the guys will be seeing plenty of mine and Kat's smiling countenances beaming back at them from the front row in the coming months. He replied, "Fantastic. Wouldn't want it any other way!".

Me neither, Tony. Me neither!

If they hadn't canceled the Jimmy Kimmell appearance for this Friday that we had tickets to, we could have it that way a little sooner, but patience is a virtue, as they say.

So that's all for now. I know this blog has been pretty much a boring pile of shite for a while now, but things are looking up. Watch this space!

No, Sugababes. No.

2008-10-10T10:10:00.001-04:00

Don't you do that.

I'm Gunna Kick Some Ass With My Own Pipe Wrench

2008-10-08T18:09:00.002-04:00

I so needed this laugh today...

The genius that is "Dustin McNeato" over at YouTube created this HILARIOUS video that totally almost caused me to soil myself with laughter.

(And by "almost"...)

Anyway, watch it, die laughing, and then check out his other great stuff at DustFilms!

I think I'm in love.

Perfect Perfect Perfect Symmetry

2008-10-06T12:24:00.004-04:00

For the love of all that is holy, get thee to Last FM to stream Keane's new album, Perfect Symmetry, a full week before it comes out.

It's sooooooooooooooooooooo good.

Not that I wasn't already jumping out of my skin at the prospect of the upcoming tour (Kat and I are going to do, at the very least, every single North American show), but now I'm so excited I could actually cry. *

They have truly outdone themselves.

*Okay, so I actually did cry. But did you really expect anything less?

A Rolling Stone Gathers No Shame

2008-09-30T21:46:00.007-04:00

While I'm not sure it's something my average reader would remember, in 1989, then-Rolling Stone Bill Wyman, (who was 52 at the time), married 18 year old Mandy Smith, whom he'd been reportedly dating off and on since she was thirteen.

To this day, I still remember reading about their wedding in some supermarket tabloid or another, which quoted Bill as saying he'd torn up his "little black book'. At the time, I wasn't particularly in awe of the age difference, (when you're a kid, a "grown up" is a grown-up, right?). Instead, I was just wondering what a little black book was for, and thinking that Mandy's dress was the most gorgeous that my 9 year old eyes had ever seen. I was sure that some day when I got married, I'd wear the same one.

Clearly my tastes have changed.

Nearly 20 years later, I can certainly recognize not only the grossness of the dress, but of the relationship itself. Imagine being 33 years old, thinking that your future partner is just being born. Yay.

In a strikingly similar and equally stomach-turning move, 61 year-old current Rolling Stone, Ron Wood, has taken up with a 20 year-old (some reports say 19) Russian waitress name Ekaterina. Hmm... I guess 'WWBWD?" is as good a code to live by as any, eh Ron?

Seriously though, what the hell is he thinking? He's apparently "deeply in love with her' and has dubbed her 'slut'. Is it still considered irony if it's that blatant?

I always thought Ron Wood was kind of fabulous (due in part to the fact that he's been with the same woman for years and, well, any friend of Rod's is a friend of mine) but right now I'm just like "Eww."

EEEWWWWW.
(Pic from The Sun)

I'm sure, much like Bill probably felt after tearing up that little black book, Ron will probably look back on this and be like "Wow. I'm an ass."

One would hope anyway.

I'm thinking the prospect of losing $100+ million will likely bring him this conclusion sooner rather than later, but one can never be sure. Who knows? Maybe something even weirder will happen, wherein Ronnie's son proposes to Ekaterina's mother.

What? Stranger things have happened!

Oh well. I guess the moral of this story is that they can't all be Charlie Watts.

No, that's not his girlfriend.

Thank God It Isn't 2003

2008-09-23T19:40:00.003-04:00

For if it was 2003, this People cover would have broken my fragile 23 year-old heart!

Yes, sir. American Idol runner-up, Broadway baby, Thom Yorke lookalike, and former object of my undying affection, Clay Aiken has come out of the proverbial closet. Props.

Much like Lindsay declaring her relationship with Samantha, the news is hardly a surprise to anyone, so this post is nowhere near as exciting as it might have been in the days when I longed to live happily ever after as Mrs. Aiken. Quite frankly, I'm more excited now by the fact that he got his old hair back, because the 'do of late was not doing it for me. Props again.

And props to the baby and that serious expression on his face that is totes making me smile.

Perfect Symmetry Never So Perfect

2008-08-06T21:47:00.004-04:00

It's that time again, folks.

My beloved Keane have announced the release date for their new album, simultaneously giving me another reason to live.

The new CD, titled "Perfect Symmetry" will be released on October 13th, and you can bet your sweet asses that I'll be first in the perfectly symmetrical line to get it. I'll also be salivating daily at the idea of a tour to back said album. I guess I should start saving my vacation days now.

As we speak, the nice folks at Keanemusic.com have offered up one free download, a song called "Spiralling" which has quickly become a new favourite of mine. It's totally unlike anything the band has done thus far, but equally amazing. Totally catchy, as per yoozh, and danceable. I'm not even sure if "danceable" is a word, but it is now, thanks to Keane.

Do yourself a favour and check it out. And then in October, do yourself an even bigger favour and buy the CD.

Just don't cut in front of me in line. :-)

Random squares never looked so good.

I Think It's Amazing

2008-07-31T20:03:00.019-04:00

So, I don't think I have to point out the fact that Marnie's World is not what it once was, and your once-faithful blogger hasn't made much time to fill you in on various goings-on. I'm finally going to give up saying, "I promise I'll be back to normal soon!" because even I know now that it's not.

There's just not enough hours in the day anymore. Of course now and again there's something too good for me to let it go, but generally, I don't have the time to pick on celebrities or detail my vacations nearly down to the second. (Hmm... never did get around to the Barbados blog. Oh well).

However, every now and then, something will happen that immediately sends my mind to the "OMFG I HAVE to blog about this" zone that it's seen so little of lately. Last week, I had such a moment. It involved two words:

George Michael.

Hot damn, people. The man is fabulous.

You know, I remember last year, watching an interview with George on TV (I think it might have been an A&E Biography actually) and thinking to myself, "If he comes on tour any time soon, I don't care what it costs, I'm going." I've always really liked him, particularly the Wham years, and anything from the Listen Without Prejudice album that came out when I was 10 years old. I could listen to "Praying for Time" 100 times over, and I've always loved the video, even though it's just lyrics on the screen. The same goes for "Freedom '90" (which has a decidedly more fun video). I just love it. But now that I'm older, I somehow can appreciate him and his music even more than when I would try to perfect my catwalk strutting skills by mimicking Estelle Halliday in the "Too Funky" video.

Anyway, due to a few unforeseen circumstances, I didn't make it to either of the Madison Square Garden shows, and when the Philly show rolled around last Saturday, I found myself going at it alone. This is of no consequence to me, as I spent the better part of my 20's going to concerts alone, but it's been a while, so it was kind of a bummer.

Traffic caused me to roll up to the Wachovia Center around 10 after 8, so I was frantic that I was missing something. The parking attendant was nice enough to let me park literally steps from the door, so that helped (He said it was because I was cute, but I think it definitely had more to do with him pitying me and my solo self). Thankfully, George didn't hit the stage until a fashionably late 8:45, allowing me ample time to settle in my seat and make some new friends with those around me.

And then the magic began.

I cannot even tell you how fabulous of a concert this was! His showmanship was incredible and his voice sounded as good as any record you've ever heard. He looked fabulous, and he can still shake that ass like in the days of "You put the boom-boom into my heart..." (only minus the Day-Glo shorts).

I was blown away.

As soon as he hit the stage I knew I was in for a real treat. My Canon camera conked out a few months ago, and unfortunately my Nikon doesn't zoom quite as nicely or clearly, but it doesn't do half bad on the video, so I've got some of that for you to enjoy.

"Fast Love", a song that's great on its own, was only made better by the random "I'm Your Man" lyrics thrown in towards the end.

Please forgive the few blacked out moments. It just so happens that the few people in front of me happened to be the tallest in Philadelphia. Or so it seemed.

I was ecstatic with even just the hint of Wham, so imagine my sheer delight when he says, "Do you really think I would take myself that seriously?" and immediately jumps into the full-length version of "I'm Your Man"! Yowza. I hadn't expected to hear ANY Wham at all, and this opened the door for more to come, so I was, to say the least, like a pig in shit.

God love the dancing behind the back-up singer. If you're gonna do, do it right... right?

It was right around that moment that I decided I was DEFINITELY going to see this show again, and that I'd be checking Pollstar the minute I got home to see the remaining dates and venues. (Which actually turned into me checking it out on my phone while waiting to get out of the parking lot, but more on that later). It was also around the time I started sorely regretting not making the trip NY for both MSG shows, but no use crying over spilt awesomeness.

He sweated his way (and quite frankly, mine) through Father Figure before taking a seat for the aforementioned "Praying for Time" which has to be my all time fave. When he sang it on Idol this year, I was near to tears in my own bedroom, 12 year-old style.

We were treated to "Hard Day" and then... what's that you say? MORE WHAM.

Oh George, that IS Everything I Want.

In between songs, George was extremely chatty and hilarious. At one point he recounted the perils of reading reviews about himself and finding it hard to remember the good things, while the bad things stick with you. "For example," he said, "The byline will read, George Michael Still Sounds Great, but Not As Pretty As He Used to Be. Oh, so I'm getting a double chin. Fuck it."

My memory card was filling quick so in my choosiness, I missed that bit, but I did get this amusing intro.

A 20-minute intermission allowed me to go and sufficiently hydrate myself and check out the merch before coming back to the juicy goodness of "Faith".

And so my memory card was dizone, but fortunately the night went on with 7 more songs, AND two encores.

The first encore was NOT "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go", as you might expect. Instead, we were treated to the scream-inducing saxophone intro of "Careless Whisper" (played by none other than Duran's own Andy Hamilton). The crowd went NUTS.

After that, George said goodbye for the second time, at which point the people next to me started gathering their things. I leaned over to the woman and said, "There's no way he's not singing "Freedom", so I wouldn't go anywhere just yet." She disagreed, but hung around anyway. Good thing, because I was right!

Had my memory card not been full, it wouldn't have much mattered because there was no way I could have stayed in focus to take any kind of pictures or video. I was dancing my ASS off, and had the sweat to prove it.

Amazing.

When the show was over, I didn't make any kind of mad dash to my car, mostly because I know how futile it is. I was still reeling over the show I'd just seen, and was on Cloud 9 as I made my way up the steps towards the doors. In front of me were two young gay guys (one of many that night, I assure you), also making their way out. I couldn't help but laugh upon hearing their conversation:

Boy 1: "I need a cheesesteak. Or a boy."

Boy 2: "I'd rather have the cheesesteak."

Boy 1: "Speak for yourself. I want meat, and it's not in a bun. Yet."

Boy 2" "You're disgusting."

Boy 1: "I'm at a George Michael concert! If I can't be this gay now, when CAN I be this gay?"

Boy 2: "Fair enough."

Ha. And I thought the night couldn't get any better.

Once I was in my car and headed through the lot, like I said, I whipped out the trusty Sidekick and checked Pollstar for the upcoming shows. He was playing Boston the following night but that was an impossibility. DC on Tuesday though. Perfect. Done.

Cut to Tuesday afternoon. My co-worker Stacy and I, blowing down I-95, making our way to meet with our beloved George. She had been in Florida over the weekend and missed the deliciousness of Philly, and I was happy to have someone to share the experience with!

It was almost criminal how quickly we got there, considering DC and its surrounding areas are supposed to be #1 in the country for traffic. I'd been there twice before (once when stalking Keane and the other to visit Micki and Jay) and both times proved that statistic beyond the shadow of a doubt. This time the Gods appeared to be smiling down on us, because we made it under 2 hours and had absolutely no problem finding the Verizon Center or the adjacent parking lot. Yay Googlemaps!

We knocked back a few GIANT Long Island Iced Teas at the Green Turtle, a sports bar connected to the Venue, and our waiter was nice enough to put my last one in a large soda cup, which allowed me to put it in my giant Balenciaga knockoff and bring it into the venue with me. Score.

Our seats weren't as close as I was in Philly, but they were great because they allowed us to see the full stage set up, something I couldn't do from the floor in Philly, being a midget and all.

The sound was a bit better from that spot as well, so you can really appreciate just how great he sounds.

Sorry for the choppiness, btw. A videographer I am not.

Sadly, he inexplicably skipped "Praying for Time", and he was decidedly less chatty this time, but it was no less mind-blowing than a few nights before. Filled with Long Island Iced Tea, Stacy and I didn't hesitate to scream the background vocals for "Father Figure" for him. I'm sure it was well appreciated by all.

At the intermission, we came out to find the drink line at least 50 people long. I turned to Stacy and remarked that there was no way I was waiting in that line. She protested, saying, "But I really want more wine". I retorted, "Oh, we're getting wine. We're just not waiting in the line." I walked up to the two gentlemen who were next in line and offered for them to keep the change if they would kindly order two wines with their order. Done and done!

That left us enough time to politely ask the usher if we could move a section closer. She obliged. Yes... a girl. Do you believe it? That never happens.

So now are seats are really good, AND we're all boozed up. Good times.

REALLY good times.

I think it's "Amazing".

If you listen closely on that one, as he goes into "Flawless" you can hear me tell Stacy, "This is the song where the other night he said "Where are my gay boys?", just before George says, "By the way, this is the gayest record I ever made."

Well, yeah.

And this was the gayest outfit.

I. Love. It.

And is that handcuffs I spy?

Once again I was FAR too insane to get any type of pictures or recording of "Freedom '90" but I knew that in advance. However, I planned ahead enough to have my wits about me for the start of "Careless Whisper".

Of course I scream through it like the true ass that I am. (Listen extra close to hear my ever-classy "Fuck yeah!" just after the scream) Plus I was totally drunk because Stacy asks how old I was when it came out, and I said "Three!!" (I was actually almost 5, and I'm normally very good at recounting those sorts of facts). Then you can hear Stacy drunkenly telling me that the guy next to her thought she was in her early 20's (now, not when the song came out) and how he's 65 (for the record, he looked great). So of course we ruined what would otherwise have been a damn good recording. Damn you, Long Island Iced Tea!

And GOD do I hate the sound of my own voice.

Anyway, to make up for my idiocy, I did manage to find a good recording of "Freedom '90" from that night, care of YouTube (thanks, Shore94!). It begins with the crowd singing "Happy Birthday" to one of the crew members, and then George asking the crowd, if they could hear one more song, which one would it be? Enjoy.

After the show, we scored some fabulous merch...

I mean, really. (PS The mug is SO much better in person)

... before taking this pic...

...and heading our asses home, ready to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed (okay, more like passing out and hungover) at work the next morning. (Wake us up before you go-go, indeed).

All I can say is that it was worth every minute. In fact, if it's even possible, I'm even MORE gutted that my would-be trip to England in August is no longer happening,*shakes fist at economy* since he's playing Earl's Court (my fave London venue) on the very dates that I'd have been there.

I guess I'll just have to hope that he's lying when he says this is is last tour. :-)

1996 Called...

2008-07-24T22:12:00.004-04:00

And you can probably imagine how the conversation went.

Photo via Perez via WENN

I Guess I Should Have At Least One Post For June

2008-06-21T12:14:00.023-04:00

And so here we are!

Much like Fliss, these days I've not been so great at updating things here at Marnie's World. Not sure exactly when my life became so hectic, but it hasn't really slowed down like I thought it might. Barring the recent Clay Aiken news I brought to you, it's really been a while since I've had much to say, so here I am.

So let's see -- what have I got to catch you up on?

Well, in mid-May, I participated in what I hope will be become an annual or semi-annual event known as "Sangriathon" in NYC. Michelle and Katie organized the whole thing, which consisted of several of us traipsing through the West Village, patronising only those establishments that served Sangria, and it was definitely a success. Of course, I'd argue that where there's Sangria, there's always success, but that could just be a coincidence.

Michelle and I enjoyed the Sangria at Panchito's, but we probably should have bended the Sangriathon Official Rules and tried a margarita, considering it was voted "one of the 6 best tasting margaritas in Manahattan" by New York Magazine.

No, really.

And for the record, I can only assume they came in at #6, or else those signs would have been worded a bit differently.

The next place had the greatest Passion Fruit Sangria ever, and a nice waiter to boot.

We actually did bend the rules a bit here and have more than one pitcher, mostly so we could try their other flavours. We're such rebels.

At different times during the day, I demonstrated what an elegant, classy lady I am.

The person who I was on the phone with had no idea what was going on at the other end of the line.

And then, well... we drank.

And drank.

And drank.

And drank.

Our fearless leaders.

Muy fabuloso.

I'm pretty sure there's no less than a million more pictures of this day floating around somewhere. I can only hope they don't come back to haunt me once I'm famous.

Later in May, I went to a few Duran Duran concerts and afterparties, which are always fun (even if Simon LeBon is wearing white crocs with black socks). I didn't take any pictures this time because my $350 camera decided that one year of working properly was quite enough, and that it wasn't going to turn on any more. (And by "one year of working properly" I mean "Only broken and in the shop 3 times". Not so sure I'll buy a Canon ever again, that's for sure.) Anyway, you'll have to take my word for it that I was there and it was good.

And then came the Caribbean.

Matt and I took a gorgeous 8-day, 7-night vacation to Barbados, which, of course, will totally warrant it's own long, drawn out post. I've had major computer issues this week (which makes a change, right?) and I'm just waiting on some more pictures, but it will be coming soon. I'm sure you'll be waiting with baited breath!

In the meantime, I'll tell you this -- there's a monkey involved.

And he has a necklace on.

Aiken With Laughter

2008-05-29T23:04:00.002-04:00

Oh 14, you've done it again.

So perhaps you might have heard this lil' bit of ridiculousness that Clay Aiken has gotten a 50 year-old woman pregnant.

*dramatic pause*

Umm... yeah.

So the woman was an executive producer on his latest album (which I actually have yet to buy, but very likely will) and despite the fact that he "stays at her home when he's in Los Angeles" the impregnation was apparently done by artificial insemination (the hell, you say!).

Yup, no hetero shenanigans here, folks.

Anyway, that's not what has me "Aiken with laughter" as this title so obnoxiously conveys. The root of that evil can be found at the brilliant Gallery of the Absurd, always a favourite of mine, by the fabulous artiste, 14.

Would you please behold this genius?

Try not to laugh. I dare you.

*Sigh* And to think I thought I'd be the one mothering his kids.

2005, where have you gone?

Harlow, Is It Me You're Looking For?

2008-05-11T19:55:00.004-04:00

For reasons unknown, this photo of Lionel Richie and his granddaughter made me howl with laughter.

Not sure if it's the shirt, or his smile, or the fact that Harlow seems to be stifling laughter too. Maybe it's all three. I don't know, but I love it.

And she's cute as hell, btw.

Just Because...

2008-04-21T21:54:00.002-04:00

... it makes me laugh every time I see it on Matt's fridge.

Happy Easter!

2008-03-23T12:06:00.001-04:00

The Ultimate Peep Show.

The Most Fabulous Mantis in the World

2008-03-21T21:27:00.003-04:00

Who needs to pray when you can celebraaaaaate!

Shake it, boo.

Carnivale originally from the amazing Cute Overload.

In the Name of Saint Patrick

2008-03-20T22:08:00.014-04:00

We do it for you, Pat.

I love the mobster in the back.

And in walks this (literal) hot tranny mess.

Spice Up Your Life

2008-03-01T20:37:00.004-05:00

The sad thing is, I spent 10 minutes debating whether or not to call this post "Zig-a-zig Ahh".

Hey there kids! It's been a while (but then I'm sure you've come to expect that from me these days). Been a busy little bee a usual, but managed to squeeze in some fun now and then.

One such fun event was the Spice Girls concert at Madison Square Garden a few weeks ago. Of course, if I was a good blogger in any way, I'd have blogged about it within 24 hours, but we know the days of 40+ posts a month are but a memory. I'm trying, I swear!

Anyway, care of my brilliant long-time friend Morgen, Matt and I got comped some fabulous third row seats, and les filles d'Spice did not disappoint!

As luck would have it, our girl Posh was the first to come over to our side of the stage.

She is fierce beyond words.

In my next life, this is who I want to come back as.

Matt knew every word to every song.

You didn't think I would just have one at a time, did you?

Funnily enough, Geri and I were dressed very similarly during this portion of the show. Except I had pants on.

I'd like to know how many sequins were sacrificed for this tour.

This hat is going on Ebay today. It's a one shot kind of deal, you know?

We swore we'd see the dancers out later, considering where we were going.

Blurry Spice.

Who Do You Think You Are?

This photo makes me realize that no matter how hard I tried on Halloween, I did not do her rack justice.

We didn't even mind that she didn't sing a song for her solo portion because her bit was fabulous.

(the sound stinks because we were right next to the speaker, but you get the idea.)

Baby is adorable. She was totes flirting with Matt too, btw.

Those are the dancers on leashes.

Idiot.

Geri's another one that looks A-MAZ-ING. But I guess we all would if we have this Behemoth training us.

I wish Sporty would lose those bangs. Honestly.

Soon came the best part. The ladies brought their children up on stage...

Baby's baby, Beau, looks a little bewildered.

And after a minute or so, little Cruz Beckham (who turned 3 the following day) started dancing! At first he started a little slow, showing his smooth moves...

Soon, little man was TEARING IT UP!

Who says Posh doesn't smile?

Little Bluebell, Geri's daughter, took mom's mic and sang the words, which was adorable, but Cruz wasn't having it! He kept right on moving, even through the group photo!

And would you please look at this pose?

Eddie Murphy's baby's all "Whah?"

Brother Romeo looked suitably impressed!

The oldest, Brooklyn, however, seems over it.

I couldn't find any one video that had super good quality and showed everything all the way through, but this one is pretty good...

However, this one, from a few nights later, shows B-boy's true style...

Tell me that's not the cutest thing ever?

(those photos from dailymail.co.uk)

When they ushered the kids right past us, I couldn't resist.

Get it, girl.

Sporty looks like she's about to have a heart attack.

And Matt looks like he's ready for another drink or two.

Loves it.

Someone got their body into shape real quick. She looks fab.

All too soon, it was over!

And Matt and I continued on until 5am with our usual nonsense.

I really really really wanna Zig-a-zig Ahh.

Forget the Baby Bump for a Second...

2008-02-25T21:19:00.001-05:00

Are we at Madame Tussauds or what?

You Can't Go Wrong With a Hot Australian

2008-02-13T20:37:00.003-05:00

Can I just call it right now? Michael Johns is the next American Idol.

And I Don't Look A Day over 27 and 364 Days

2008-02-06T22:17:00.001-05:00

Ahh, and here we have arrived at the obligatory birthday post.

Two years ago, I was somewhat horrified at the idea of aging. Last year, my birthday, happened to fall just after my life's course took an amazing new direction, so suddenly turning 27 suddenly didn't seem so bad. Of course, the Tom Chaplin cake didn't hurt.

When I wake up tomorrow morning, 28 will have already reared its ugly head and, once again, my life has completely changed direction. My great big spectacular move to England isn't happening at the moment, or perhaps ever, which is a story that I'm not even going to get into, for fear of ending up with the longest blog post ever (and you know how never-ending my ramblings can be!). Suffice it to say that everything happens for a reason and for whatever reason, here I shall remain. Keep your eyes peeled for a nasty post about immigration lawyers some time in the future, which will shed some light on my sitch.

Anyway, I'm looking forward to new things on the horizon (things which I'm not going to write about here right now for fear of them going the way of the dodo as well) and much like last year, I don't really care about turning 28 because I have so much else going on. Dangerously close to 30? Sure, but my boobs have managed to stay in relatively the same general area as last year, so that's a step in the right direction, right? Be thankful for the small things, I always say!

(While my ass isn't quite where it was in the summer, at least I don't have to wear a bikini in February, so that buys me a little time.)

On Saturday I'm throwing what I hope will be fantastic par-tay for myself in the NYC and a shocking number of people have RSVPed in the positive, so yay to each and every one of them! I totes love my friends.

Now, fingers crossed that my plan to start the night at a Mexican restaurant won't backfire.

For the Good of Humanity, Spencer Pratt Must Be Stopped

2008-02-05T22:15:00.000-05:00

"It would be crazy. Music is what I really want to focus on. I'm not too worried about TV. Music is my life and my passion. I really want to be an entertainer. I feel like so much of what's missing in music right now is that amazing entertainer. I want for people in 20 years to be like, 'Do you remember that Heidi Montag concert? That was the craziest show ever!' I want it to be really fun and memorable." -- Heidi Montag, The Hills.

Oh You GO Girl!!!

2008-01-31T21:19:00.001-05:00

"It took a Clinton to clean after the first Bush and I think it might take another one to clean up after the second Bush." - Hilary Clinton '08.

Word.

This Picture Is Hilarious in a Thousand Different Ways*

2008-01-28T21:01:00.000-05:00

*Yeah, I went there.

Merry Christmas 2007!

2007-12-25T22:45:00.000-05:00

As you may recall from last year, Simon REALLY likes opening presents. He normally charges down the stairs on Christmas morning and starts tearing at them with reckless abandon. It's like watching a small child.

This year, I awoke to a strange noise. I peeked over my bed, to find Simon very quietly tearing at his presents, making as little noise as possible. (No, seriously -- he's that smart). Upon hearing my sharp "Hey!" he immediately jumped back, well aware that he was doing something he wasn't supposed to be doing, and walked over to be lifted onto the bed.

Once we got downstairs, he waited for the go-ahead and got down to business:

After opening each toy, he pranced it around in front of everyone, making sure we all were sufficiently jealous of all of his new things.

He basked in the sunlight a little with some...

Before posing in front of the tree with others...

And making sure we saw the last few...

Best of all, he got to enjoy everything without having to suffer the indignity that he'd suffered a few days before...

I'd say it was a very merry Christmas for everyone!!

And Nigel thinks so too!!

Hope everyone had a wonderful holiday!

A Moment on the Lips, A Lifetime on the Hips...

2007-12-10T19:34:00.000-05:00

And so it begins again!

First we had "Operation Bikini in Spain". The new version is "Operation Bikini in General".

It's gonna be fun holiday.

Changes are Afoot...

2007-12-09T16:46:00.000-05:00

In this, the weekend of the blog, I've decided to make a few long overdue adjustments to Marnie's World.

For starters, I've actually posted, which makes a change. :-)

I also decided to do away with the "Best of Marnie's World" section. I hadn't even updated in over two years (and more importantly, couldn't be bothered to) so it wasn't really a fair representation of what this site has to offer.

(Haha... I don't know either)

Anyway, in place of the "Best Of" I decided to put in a "Categories section", where you can narrow down the posts to find what you might be looking for. Sort of like Perez's "Icky Icky Poo" or "Gay Gay Gay" sections, only, you know... not.

In other words, if you're just here to see Simon, you don't have to wade through all my shit talk on Paris and the bunch, or my various travels near and far. This post, for example, will fall under the "Random Ramblings" category. Do you see what I've done there? :-)

As we've found in the past, most of you are usually just looking for weird or perverted stuff anyway, so it probably makes very little difference, but whatevs. It's the thought that counts.

See? I really do care.

Not With a 10 Foot Pole

2007-12-09T12:26:00.000-05:00

Someone needs to lay off the collagen, STAT.

Simon in the City

2007-12-08T15:07:00.000-05:00

In my last post, I mentioned how once, during my various trips to New York, I brought Simon along for the ride. This, of course, was like two months ago, but I've since decided that the pictures are just too cute not to share.

He spent most of the weekend spooning Matt and ignoring me, or watching us paint Matt's living room, but on Sunday I decided to treat him to some fun at the Tompkin's Square Park Dog Run, home of the beloved Dog Halloween Parade, and favourite haunt of Cityrag's Buddy.

After we left Matt's, we drove into Manhattan and the fun truly began.

When we first arrived at the park, Simon was a little tentative.

For a while he just sat on my lap and watched from the sidelines.

He also took a moment to check out what was going on in the "Big Dog" area.

And to see what fellow Jack Russel, Nina, was up to.

Soon he got the courage to venture out.

He was very tentative at first, even heading for the exit at one point.

Soon, he was heading back to me and my lap.

First, he sat with Nina for a second, still checking things out.

Then it was, "Okay, I'm over this. Pick me up."

Also leary of the crowds was Toby, yet another Jack Russel.

At first, when Simon looked at him, Toby glanced over, baring his teeth. His owner quickly scolded him, and he stopped.

Soon, he and Simon were moving closer together. They quickly became buddies.

Getting friendly with Toby seemed to loosen Simon up a little, and he headed back out into the fray.

Mostly for some sniffin'.

And more sniffin'.

They double-teamed this poor dog.

"Did you smell that?" "I know, right?"

Soon both Simon and Toby were ready to hit the benches again.

Clearly, Simon was getting tired.

My meter was running out anyway, so we headed out. Simon was totally enjoying the sights (and smells) of the Big Apple. His particularly ridiculous "Roary the Lion" doggy booster seat helped out immensely.

"This is amazing."

"Is that a bodega?"

Of course he also had to see what was happening on my side.

Then he started remembering that he was tired.

A busy day soon catches up with him.

And by the time we hit the Turnpike...

This was it, the whole way home!

Zzzzzzzz...

No Rest For the Weary, the Wicked, or Me.

2007-12-07T21:02:00.001-05:00

2007 has been a really incredible year for me.

The words "hectic" and "busy," while appropriate, are both severe understatements of what this year has been like. I think the amount of blogs that I've posted in comparison to previous years is a real testament to that. I've never had so little time to just sit and do nothing -- something that my life was absolutely wrought with in the past.

Back in January I found out that my 8 year dream of moving to England was finally a real possibility, thanks to some revisions in one of the immigration schemes. So now here I had something long-term to look forward to, rather than dealing with the sickening day to day reality that my life was never truly going to be what I wanted it to be. What an amazing feeling that was.

In the short term, I had my trip to Spain ahead of me, which forced me to become a fitness fiend, watching what I ate, and working out an average of 6-8 times a week. "New Marnie in '07" and all that. I managed to get down to 117 lbs. and the bikini thing worked out pretty well. (Cut to December, where it's a slightly different case, but that's for a whole other entry).

In the interim, there were other concerts to be seen (yay Lily) and more fun to be had, (and unfortunately, work to be done) but in general the first few months of the year were relatively calm. Things started to really pick up after about April.

Before the Spain trip, there was, of course, the ridiculously amazing Tour de Keane, a trip which could not have gone any better, short of the words "Tom, do you take Marnie to be your lawfully wedded wife...". And well, what with moving to England and all, there's plenty of time for that later. ;-) That was the first point where my blogging really took a hit, and I never really regained my footing after that. It was also when emails started to sit in my inbox for weeks and even months before they got answered. And for once, it wasn't because I'm lazy!

After my Spain/England vay-cay was over, and I'd announced my plans to my friends, the rest of the year had the potential to be really anti-climactic. Instead, the real whirlwind began and, quite honestly, hasn't settled down since. I have quite literally run myself ragged and abused my body for 17 straight weeks.

As soon as I got back, Kat and I went to see Muse in concert at Madison Square Garden, which led to us hanging out the following few weekends, ultimately ending up at the Rufus Wainwright concert in August. That, of course, is where I met Matt.

Since then, I don't think I can even begin to get into the weekends I've had, other than to say I certainly wouldn't have had time to blog about them all, nor would I have been able to do them justice. I've been in New York almost every single weekend for one reason or another (usually the reason involves filling myself with booze of some kind) and if not, then I've been up in the middle of the week. SO many freaking concerts, Fashion sample sales, house parties, a long weekend in Atlantic City,"Girls Nights Out", general random drunkenness , and let's not even start on Halloween! I've been to more gay bars than I can count, and I've all but dissolved my liver. It's been pretty ludicrous actually.

Do you need examples? Well okay then. I should have posted these a long time ago anyway...

Mmm hmm. And there are more where that came from, most of them a lot less postable. And those are just the weekends we took pictures.

Oh yeah, and for good measure, I met Jim Gaffigan again.

You'd think I'd have been totes over it a long time ago, but really, Thanksgiving weekend was the first weekend that I really thought, "Okay. You need to stop." On that Friday, I wanted nothing more than to be sitting on my couch at home, watching movies and eating junk, (probably unshowered). Instead, by Saturday I was drunk, dancing to "All I Want For Christmas" at the Ritz, watching Valdez make a fool out of himself. (Okay, that was totally fun and I didn't want to be home then). But you know what I mean. I was tired.

Due to unfortunate scheduling, Matt and I had a big weekend in Philly planned, so last weekend was not to be a restful one either. The general debauchery of Friday could have been done at any time, of course, but the MIA concert on Saturday was locked in, so what the hell. Might as well make it a full 48 hours. Admittedly, we both spent the majority of the week prior dreading it, but it actually turned out pretty great. Friday was fun (and cheap!), the concert was amazing, and our hotel room was sweet. My wallet and I could have done without all the shopping we did, but there are worse things in life. At the very least, I didn't have to make the drive up to New York, right?

So anyway, that brings us to this weekend. For the last 5 days, I've been practically salivating at the thought of coming home and passing out on the couch, watching Judge Judy and not moving for the next 48 hours. So tonight came, and I did just that. I watched Judge Judy, then Project Runway, then passed out for a bit more, woke up and watched the Exorcism of Emily Rose, whilst stuffing myself with peanut butter crackers. It was exactly everything I was hoping for.

So then why am I about to kill myself from boredom?

Seriously, it's 10:19 and I want to get dressed and go out. Alcohol doesn't necessarily have to be involved, but I'm totes craving human contact. I'm half tempted to go to Uncles tomorrow night by my damn self. (Jay, call me!).

Next weekend I'm supposed to get together with Michelle and the girls and I'm already counting the days. Saturday I want to go see my boy Robert do stand-up (whom, by the way, will totes be getting a plug on here when I'm feeling witty enough to make it as good as he deserves it to be) because a $5 cover and awesome drink specials are just too good to pass up. Plus, I want to rock some of the new shit I bought last weekend. :-)

What, is that not reason enough?

So anyway, I'm not really sure what the idea of this post is, other than to catch up on the blog that I've been so disgracefully neglecting as of late. Realistically, it's probably going to be relatively neglected for the remainder of the year as well, now that the "New Marnie in '07" is no longer the type to sit around doing nothing, which was formerly my very favourite thing. It's like I've developed ADD or something. Whatevs. At least I'm making the most of my time left here. If this weekend has taught me anything, it's that it's going to be the last of it's kind of a long, long while.

I'd like to apologise to my liver in advance.

Gimme MUCH Less

2007-12-05T21:49:00.000-05:00

Hell to the no.

Red Carpet Massacre Love

2007-11-23T22:26:00.000-05:00

As you may or may not have heard/seen/read lately, my boo boos have a new album out.

Duran Duran's Red Carpet Massacre was released a few weeks ago and if you haven't rushed out to buy it yet, I urge you to do so. And I'm not saying that because I'm biased or because I think Simon Le Bon won't be able to eat if you don't. I'm saying that because it's really good.

Sure, I didn't become a huge fan until the Medazzaland era, which might cause some to say my taste is questionable, and I don't quite hate Thank You as much as Q Magazine, but still, I'm not that biased. I can recognize that not everything Duran Duran puts out is pure gold .

But Red Carpet Massacre is truly a good album. I actually was lucky enough to hear it several months before its release and I loved it even back then in its very raw form. It's seeming to get mixed reviews within the Duranie community, but I think that has a lot to do with the presence of Justin Timberlake and Timbaland.

Some people just don't like change. Anyway, whatevs, I love it, and I think you should buy a copy.

Plus, maybe Simon is hungry. I don't know.

(hey, at least there was no "like the wolf" pun there).

Anyway, to promote the album's release, the boys did a 10-show run on Broadway at the Barrymore Theatre. Well... it supposed to be a 10 show run. It was going brilliantly, until it was cut short ("massacred", if you will) by the strike. I was lucky enough to attend one of the shows while it was still at the Barrymore, and it really was something to behold. One of the best Duran Duran shows I've ever been to.

It even had a seriously cute Broadway style playbill, complete with "Cast" bios and shit:

SIMON LEBON (Simon). Mr. LeBon made his theatre debut in the West End production of Tom Brown's School Days. He is thrilled to return to the stage in the Broadway production of Duran Duran's Red Carpet Massacre.
As a young child, LeBon's appearance as "the boy in the dirty shirt" in a TV commercial for Persil (powdered laundry detergent) left him with a profound sense of inferiority which, it has been hypothesized, provided the impetus which has spurred him on ever since.

(it goes on like that. Very cute.)

Unfortunately, I was about 6 inches from the speaker so the sound on my clips is not at all a fair representation of what the night was like, but I'm posting them anyway.

Last Chance on the Stairway

All She Wants Is

And let's face it -- if it's good enough for tiny billionaire Mary Kate Olsen, it should be good enough for you.

She was rocking out. So was the guy behind her. Didn't see him? Watch it again.

Can I just say, I know I've had my beef with MK in the past, but seeing her enjoying herself like that really made me kind of like her. Am I softening in my old age? Probably, but really, any fan of Duran Duran is a friend of mine.

Well, except the batshit crazy ones. (And there's no shortage of them, let me tell you.)

Anyway, Mary Kate was totally cute and kind of awesome and I don't think I'm going to mean to her anymore. She was totes smiling too. I hope her kidney's okay.

By the way, that was Donald Trump sitting in front of her. He was with Melania and Donald Jr., two rows behind me on the floor up until the intermission when they moved him up to the balcony. At the end of the show, his ass was standing up and swaying to the music, which kind of puts him in my good books now too. Oh plus he totally kept winking at me during intermission so yeah, he's totally cool. :-)

At first I thought it was Lydia Hearst with Mary Kate, but then it occurred to me that an heiress would totes not be rocking a Sass and Bide from '05.

So anyway, where the hell was I?

Ahh yes, the concert. It was phenomenal. Here's a clip of Ordinary World that will probably make your ears bleed because of that whole speaker proximity issue, but if you have a good imagination, you'll probably like it.

Me and Paul. I'm on the right.

So the following Saturday, after seeing Bon Jovi with Stacy, I went into the city to hang with Paul, Alan, Cell Phone Al, and even Dom. When I asked how that night's show went, that's when I found out about the strike. Total bummer -- and I didn't even have tickets for any of the remaining shows. I felt so bad for them!

To the management's credit, they spent the next two days BUSTING ASS to get the show rescheduled at the Roseland for Monday and Tuesday. Of course you had people complaining that it wasn't the same experience and that it was GA instead of assigned seats, but they offered a refund and hell... it wasn't their fault, so get over it.

Truth be told, it kind of ended up working out for me because up until then it had been a "no comps" tour and the larger venue allowed me to get my ass on the guest list so, well... yay. I was up in the city with Matt for the Ben Sherman sample sale anyway, so it worked out great. I knew he would love the show too, so off we went.

While we were greeting Paul outside (while he was waiting for Adrien Brody) we saw Heather Graham go in. How cute is she, by the way? And where the hell has she been?

So anyway, does anyone remember when I blogged about Genesis, and I was bitching about drunk people at concerts? Yeah... well, my bad. :-)

We don't know either.

To say I was a hot mess would be the understatement of the year. "Raging embarassment" would probably be more apropos. Matt was in a similar state, but probably not to the extent that I was. I was dancing my ASS off, though and it was like the best time EVER. Matt totally loved it too. I think we can now safely say that Skin Divers is "our song". I should use this time to publicly apologise to the guy whose beer I knocked out of his hand during "She's Too Much." I had every intention of buying you a new one when the song was over (it's my fave) but my drunken self had forgotten about 10 seconds later. The fact that my bag was on one side of the floor, my Sidekick on the other, and I was somewhere in between should have told you I was a lost cause. I'll get you next time. ;-)

So back to my original point, even if you missed out on the juicy goodness that was these shows, you can still be a part of the magic. Buy Red Carpet Massacre and you can pretend you were there. You won't regret it.

And if you do, at least you don't know where I live. :-)

Halloweekend

2007-11-06T21:12:00.000-05:00

About damn time, right?

In fairness, I've been waiting for someone *cough* KAT *cough* to send me all the additional pics. I didn't want to have two separate posts because I'm anal like that.

Anyway, onto Halloween '07!

As you may have guessed from previous years, I take Halloween very seriously. I don't like to waste an opportunity to dress/act like an idiot, and I don't skimp on the details. This year was no exception. In fact, I think this year's brilliance was all in the details.

I had originally thought I'd go as my girl Lily Allen (mostly because I have a dress that'd be perfect and I have similar cankles). However, after I met Matt and we quickly became 2 peas in a pod, I thought it might be fun to do some sort of duo thing.

No, not that.

We actually decided to go as David and Victoria Beckham. We'd thought of it a while back, but being the procrastinators we are, he was jersey-less and I was wig-less up until the final days before the weekend. I was pretty much crapping myself because I didn't have any other ideas. Plus I'd already bought the fabulous shoes. Nevermind that they were the only thing I bought.

Anyway, fate smiled upon us and we managed to find everything in the nick of time -- and I do mean everything:

Right down to the tattoos, hair color and lots and lots of bronzer.

Oh, and an obscene amount of padding and packaging tape. The funny thing is that mine still look more real than hers.

You can tell we were so enjoying being in character. At first, everyone had to remind me to not smile for photos, but soon I was so into it.

That hot mess in the back is Mikko, who was dressed as "white trash/euro trash".

He was working it hard.

Kat, who prefers to be on the other side of the camera, and Matt dressed as paparazzi. At first, Matt was that very special kind of paparazzo (the kind without a camera) but we hooked his ass up.

We started the evening at Matt's neighbour's shindig...

Where Posh discussed getting some more work done by Dr. Zack...

He wishes. :-)

Posh takes the trash out. And I'll bet you thought she had someone do that for her.

David has to remind Victoria to be a lady.

As you can see, things started to get ridiculous pretty early on, so we decided to head to a party thrown by a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend.

We made sure to stay in character while getting out of the taxi.

Right down to the typical Hollywood money shot.

Kat and Matt were flashing away, yelling "David! Victoria!" like true pros, while we continued playing the part.

Eventually, we knocked it off and made it into the damn party -- where we started all over again.

Giving the paps something to shoot.

If it was socially acceptable, I'm fairly certain he and I would dress like this every day.

David consorts with a paparazzo.

I think he might be cheating.

Perhaps with multiple people.

Playing around with "White Trash" (I liked "Euro Trash" better since Mikko is from Finland)

AND Charlie Chaplin.

And then there was that.

Meanwhile, I was enjoying this WAY too much.

(even if my padding was showing all damn night)

Like the real Beckhams, we were totes loving the cameras.

How I didn't bust straight out of this dress is beyond me.

Someone's not a very good papparazzo. That's a great shot, and he's missing it.

And now he just looks disgusted!

You have no idea how much I am in love with this picture. It pretty much sums up the rest of Mikko's night.

After a while, we were kind of over it, and went looking for a fun bar.

We found one.

Victoria's getting drunker...

Pretty sure David is too.

I did come out of character a few times! And would you please look at the guy behind me?

Oh, the dramatics.

With our biggest fan.

Well... my biggest fan.

We're all REALLY drunk now.

And yet, not near as drunk as Mikko.

Love him.

Hot messes.

Posh and Becks!

I wanted this picture outside of the "Chip Shop" because of the Union Jack, but it didn't really work out!

Taking out our fabulous trash -- again.

After the Taxi Ride of Death, we managed to make it home in one piece.

Where Mikko comforted a decidedly distressed Kat.

And then had a few more drinks. Of course he did.

After a bit of dramz and some late night/early morning pasta, we once again became ourselves and headed to bed. And thus was the end of another great year in costume.

So this post was late in coming, but I think the pics make up for it. And hell, I didn't call it "Spooktacular III". Don't ever let anyone say I'm a one trick pony.

Halloween Post Coming Soon!

2007-11-01T19:37:00.000-04:00

Just waiting on some more pics.

This year's good -- I promise.

You Can Never Have Too Much Morrissey

2007-10-31T22:08:00.000-04:00

Ahh, Halloween. My absolute favourite holiday. For this year's costumed weekend, I threw in a little Morrissey to the mix, so you know I was totes loving it.

Friday after work I made the trip to Matt's place so we could beautify ourselves before Moz Concert #1. Unfortunately, a trip that should never take more than 2 and a half hours took 4, so it didn't leave us much time to do that beautifying. Good thing we're already pretty smokin, right?

Anyway, we got to the venue with just enough time to down 4 champagnes each before my boy entered the stage. We took a convenient place by the bar and the fun began.

The concert had all the usual -- the drunks, the hipsters, the "depressed" ones in all black, the ones with the Gladiolas in the pockets of their cuffed jeans, ready to be thrown onto the stage, and the friends who got dragged there who don't even know where they are until the intro to How Soon is Now starts. ("Ohhh! HIM!," they cry!). A large portion of them had Morrissey-style coifs. You know the deal. Friday night actually had a disproportionate number of gays in attendance too, so that was a stroke of luck. Too bad most of them were the aforementioned coifed, cuffed-jeaned messes.

Well, there was that cute Latino, but he couldn't dance for shit so he's out. But I digress...

Anyway, the show was great as per yoozh, even though we were all the way at the back. Matt hoisted me onto his back for a bit of the encore (which I'm sure both he and his spine are regretting, even a week later) so that was one opportunity for me to see that it was actually Morrissey up there and not just a recording.

My boy Ginge ever so kindly got us into the afterparty which, surprisingly, Morrissey actually showed up to. He just sat quietly at his own table with his sister and some other peeps, but Lord knows I love to just say "I was at a party 5 feet from Morrissey." It's all I need in life really. I could've done without the cash bar, but then I remember what a lucky bitch I am and start enjoying reality once more.

I got to say hello to the adorable Mikey and catch up a bit with Boz before heading out. Matt and I hit a gay bar or two before meeting back up with Ginge, Ken, Boz, Ian, Larry, Brian, and a few others. The usual crew! It was nice to introduce Matt to a little of my world since I've totally ingratiated myself into his. "It's reciprocal!" as Boz said. :-)

My boys.

After a few more drinks, Matt and I said our goodbyes and headed to the Ritz for some more gay fun! It's amazing how much hotter the guys generally were there than at the Phoenix. Not that it affects me or my vagina in any way, but it's nice to look at. Once again, the bathroom stall didn't lock (what is it with gay bars?? -- oh wait...) and someone with little to no interest in it, got to see me in all my hoohah-wiping glory. Hoorah!!

The last thing I remember is passing out in the cab. Quite the lady, me.

Saturday's Halloween festivities are going to be granted their own post, so let's just jump to Sunday, shall we?

Sunday afternoon was spent doing a whole lot of nothing -- unless eating too much Chinese food and watching Roseanne on DVD counts as "something" -- but that still didn't stop me from being late to Kat's. Nor did it stop me from forgetting the tickets and having to go back to her apartment for them, once we'd left for the venue. You'd think all that lying around doing nothing would've given my brain time to recover from the night before, but you'd be wrong.

All that nonsense aside, Kat and I made it in time to see the opening act, which we had a pretty sweet place in the crowd for. My plan was to stay there and see the show from a bit closer, but my desire for more champagne outweighed my desire to be able to see anything, so the spot was lost when we trekked back to the bar. We once again planted ourselves in a very desirable position by the bar and I'm happy to say I could see nearly everything.

There weren't nearly as many gays there that evening, but sweet Jesus, there were more people with B.O. than I've ever smelled in one place at one time instead. There were times when the people around us were literally gagging, and my eyes were tearing up regularly. You'd have to have smelled it yourself to even imagine. Seriously people, I know you feel you have to wait in line for weeks on end to get a good spot in the crowd, but at least bring some wipes or something.

Please.

Anyway, I enjoyed the setlist a bit more on Sunday (what wasn't marred by the stench of the flannel shirts around me) but otherwise it was pretty much a repeat of Friday.

Right down to the drinking until the wee hours of the morning...

I was relegated to water at this point. How sad for me.

Even Marisa showed up!

I'm having a déjà vu!

Group Love.

And that, my friends, is how you do Morrissey. :-)

(How lax am I getting with my endings, by the way?)

It's a Boy!

2007-10-30T19:09:00.000-04:00

CONGRATULATIONS to new parents Danielle and Mario!!!

Nicholas Angelo was born on Thursday, October 25, weighing a whopping 6lbs 13ozs and measuring 19 1/2 inches.

The world is now a better place.

As If They Aren't Loveable Enough

2007-10-24T23:13:00.000-04:00

Some time back, I reported my disappointment in Tim Rice-Oxley, of my beloved Keane, due to his supposed songwriting for the nightmare that is Ashlee Simpson. It wasn't long before it was exposed as nonsense, and I quickly updated the post. I obviously wasn't giving him enough credit.

Once again, he does not dissapoint:

Keane to Avoid Britney
Keane have revealed they turned down a request to write for Toxic singer Britney Spears.

Despite having collaborated with Gwen Stefani and the Pussycat Dolls, the boys drew the line at Brit, saying: "There are some things we definitely won't do."

Keyboardist Tim Rice-Oxley added: "We turned down Britney Spears. After the Gwen thing we were offered a lot of work. But both Gwen and Nicole from Pussycat Dolls are phenomenally talented, and we wouldn't want to start diluting that level of musical quality."

Oh dear, if it carries on like this Brit'll have to drag out the python again.

Yay! The best part is that, like with Ashlee, he blatantly slammed Britney for being the waste of space that she is, but in that charming British way.

"We wouldn't want to start diluting that level of musical quality."
(read: "She's a freaking train wreck and we're staying far, far away.")

Oh, how I love you, Tim.

Looks like someone just caught her VMA performance.

Okay, So This Might Be My Favourite Thing Ever.

2007-10-04T19:29:00.001-04:00

So brilliant.

The best part is the reporter at the end "confronting" him.

Oh yeah, and how adorable is Philip McCall???

This is the World We Live In, This is the Blog We Write On

2007-09-30T22:48:00.000-04:00

Even I have to roll my eyes at how corny my titles have gotten in my old age.

I guess I'd better get a-bloggin' about the Genesis concert Kat and I went to before 10 months goes by. (It would appear that "our thing" has become to see British musical trios together, by the way.)It's not quite been two weeks, so by Marnie time, it was practically yesterday.

To be honest, I don't have anything over exciting or informative to say about this show. I had looked forward to it for a while, and by some kind of miracle, we were able to score second row seats for less than face value, two days before the show, so that was pretty sweet. The show was very, very good, but if I'm being honest, I much more enjoyed Phil Collins' solo show 3 years ago. That was seriously one of the best shows I've ever seen. It was over 3 hours long and he played every song you can think of.

With Genesis, admittedly, I didn't know at least half the songs which, let's face it, makes all the difference at a show. It also didn't help that with the exception of the guy immediately to my right, we were surrounded by a bunch of drunken idiots. Sometimes I wish they'd ban booze at shows (namely the shows that I've driven to). What I wish they'd ban more is dumbass blondes that sit on the laps of in-house security (honey, he can't do anything for you) and their friends that are so trashed after two beers that they don't even realize their denim skirts are now on completely backwards. If we could ban that, then the booze could flow freely.

That said, Phil Collins is adorable and his voice sounds great. Mike Rutherford, Tony Banks, and the rest of the crew sounded great as well. Age ain't nothin' but a number, eh boys?

I think the best part of the show for me was when Phil had a long drum solo and Kat leans over really serious and says "He's got nothin' on Richard". I love Kat. :-)

Speaking of Phil, he worked the crowd well, and didn't even let it bother him when he got attacked by a bee mid-show...

Haha, just kidding. How funny was that though?

Anyway, I'm glad I got to see them on this, their "last" tour, even if they didn't sing "That's All."

But seriously -- why didn't they sing "That's All"????

Either way, it was good. And now we know what it's going to be like to see Keane in 30 years. :-)

I'm Still Not Quite Sure Why We Don't Have Our Own Show.

2007-09-30T22:45:00.000-04:00

NSFW NSFW NSFW NSFW!!!

Marnie's World: American Idol Edition

2007-09-30T22:07:00.000-04:00

Anyone remember when Marnie's World used to be kind of good, and updated on a semi-regular basis?

Well, okay. But it was updated on a semi regular basis.

Like about 87 weeks ago (or maybe 3), I worked the American Idols tour in Philly (and when I say "worked" I mean I carried a box of 8x10s out to the merch truck and then hung out in catering the rest of the night). I didn't see a whole lot of the show, but I listened to some of the soundcheck and I watched the last few songs from sidestage, and it was enough to peak my interest. I couldn't see shit from sidestage...

...so I decided that I'd actually watch the show in Atlantic City the following night. I'd imagine no one would have really cared to read about it right after it happened, let alone light years later, but whatevs. I have some free time, so I'm writing about it.

I'll start with what was probably one of the funnier moments of the night. After we first go to AC, Stacy and I went backstage, and walked past the Idols, who were just milling around in the hallway. When we got to the end of the corridor, Stacy turned and looked back down the hall. She squinted a little and says "Who's the girl with the pony tail leaning against the wall? I don't remember her on the show?"

I turned, looked, and laughed my ass off. "Umm... that's Sanjaya."

Ha!

A few minutes later, we saw his sister, who is apparently acting as his chaperone on the tour. Guess she got the time off from Hooters. For the record, she was fully clothed, and there was no guitar in sight.

Anyway, after that we hung out in the hot-ass catering room for a bit, eating Chex Mix and drinking orange Gatorade (because that's whole we roll), and watching Chris Richardson sniff a spoonful of grated cheese and ask "Is this Parmesan? It smells like Parmesan". The life of a roadie is a good one.

The show itself was entertaining to say the least. I got a much different perspective than I did watching the show. For one thing, I wasn't overly impressed by the aforementioned Chris Richardson during his run on TV. I didn't particularly dislike him or anything, but I didn't feel one way or the other. In person? He impressed the hell out of me -- and not just when he almost out-beatboxed Blake or killed it on the drums. He had a LOT of songs in the show (dare I say, more than anyone else?) and for good reason. He was good.

The other thing is that Melinda and Lakisha really are that good. When Lakisha was singing "I Will Always Love You", when she got to the quiet bit before that part, I turned to Stacy and said "She's about to bring the house down." She did.

Melinda made the hair on my arms stand up more than once. It's almost a shame that the two of them had to even reduce themselves to a television talent show, even one with the scope of Idol. Bitches are TALENTED.

Fortunately, they're much better at singing than I am taking photos.

Chris Sligh, who was a fave of mine during the few weeks he was on the show, wasn't showcased that much, which was a bit of a disappointment. I heard through the grapevine that he was none too pleased about it either. The quote I heard went something like, "I sold my soul to the devil and came in 10th." Ha. Make of that what you will.

Blake was Blake. Phil was Phil, etc. Sanjaya was surpisingly entertaining, even if his voice isn't one iota better than you think it'd be. I cringed for him more than once, but I did enjoy his lil' Michael Jackson bit.

I also LOVED when all the guys came out to perform as a "band" that they "formed" while they were bored on the bus. It REALLY enjoyed it.

Does that make me crayzay?

Jordin blew me out of the water too. I was slightly underwhelmed by her Idol win, thinking that Blake certainly had more of the "whole package". Of course the whole Keane thing immediately renders me biased, but you know how it is. Anyway, Jordin live made a believer out of me. I totally saw why she won. She's not only got a voice to knock your socks off, but she's personable on stage. Oh, and GORGEOUS, by the way...

Seriously. I don't think my skin was that flawless right out of the canal. She's also about 9 and a half feet tall. I'm not loving her "Tattoo" song, but it might grow on me. Her album drops in November, and I do wish her well.

Chris is a cutie in person. For reals.

Of course Blake and I talked about Keane. That was one ship that I couldn't let sail.

My girl Melinda was the BEST. That sweetness you saw on the show wasn't an act. At one point while we were talking to her she stopped and said to everyone, "I'm sorry, but you two have the nicest eyelashes I've ever seen! Seriously! Has everyone seen their eyelashes?" Ha. I fessed up that while Stacy's are au naturel, mine are entirely care of Loreal Volume Shocking. She said the ones glued to her face were so unnatural that she'll try anything. Maybe I should send her some. That's how much I loved her.

None of the others showed up to the little after thing except Haley, and I didn't get a picture with her.

Oh wait, one more person showed up...

I love this one most of all.

And can I just say that he's not really all that friendly? I mean, he's not a dick or anything, but see that smile? That's strictly for the photos. When you walk up to him, he's kind of just... I don't know... blank. I attribute it more to shyness, or maybe the fact that he knows that he's become more of a pop culture punching bag than anything else, but either way, he spoke way less than any of the others. He and Chris (R.) were the only ones signing shit through the fence in Philly the night before though, so maybe he's not so bad.

Anyway, that was pretty much it. I'm glad I went (but equally glad I didn't have to pay) and I hope that most of them are able to make something of themselves.

Even Sanjaya's sister.

Umm... So... Yeah.

2007-09-10T23:28:00.000-04:00

Do people still think Paris Hilton is pretty?

Just wondering.

PS Wonky eyes are hot.

Gimme Less

2007-09-09T21:04:00.000-04:00

I just watched Britney's "comeback performance" and unfortunately it's 4 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

I'm sure some blogs will be buzzing later tonight about how great it was, and how she managed to pull it off, but I'm going to have to be a naysayer on this one. With all the buzz about how she was going to blow us all away, I expected much more than that. She blew, alright -- but I'm still here.

I'm not a big fan of her "comeback single" Gimme More as it is. I think it's repetitive and annoying. Add to that some ratty extensions, obvious lip-synching, and amateur-looking choreography and color me unimpressed. Her face was so 'blah' the whole time. She looked nervous and/or disinterested, and I'm not quite sure which is worse.

It's time to pack it in, Britney. It's over.

Can we talk about what a trainwreck this show is as a whole though? As I'm writing this, it's 14 minutes in and already Britney sucked, Sarah Silverman bombed (even her cracks on Paris Hilton weren't well-received), and Pete Wentz's mic wasn't on when they cut to him. Way to go, MTV.

And what's with the random cutting to different acts playing elsewhere in Vegas? How avant-garde.

So far the only high points were 50-Cent being particularly likeable during the red carpet interviews and Rihanna looking adorable accepting her "Monster Single of the Year" award for Umbrella. Other than that? Garbage.

Everyone keeps reiterating how, unlike past years, this show won't be rerunning at all. I think that's probably best for everyone.

Especially Britney.

Bye.

2 Weekends of Fun: New York Style

2007-08-26T19:48:00.000-04:00

Oh my God, how much fun has my life been lately?

I mean, work has totes been kicking my ass hardcore, but I've been more than making up for it with some of the most fun-filled NYC weekends ever. I probably can't even put it into words so it conveys how it's really been, but I'm going to try. And I'm going to be long-winded about it, as per yoozh.

Rufus Wainwright was playing Central Park last Sunday, and Kat and I decided to make a 3-day fun-fest out of it, so I drove up on Friday after work. I don't know what made me decide to drive into Manhattan, and I was pretty terrified at the idea at first, but it turned out that I was pretty awesome at it, and it's not near as scary as people say. I was actually laughing about it this morning as I was blowing down Columbus Avenue eating a grilled cheese sandwich and sending a text message. I should totes be a cabbie. Anyway, I'm getting off track and way ahead of myself. Back to last weekend.

I worked late on Friday, so I didn't get in until around 10, but that gave us plenty of time to get our drink on. We kept it pretty calm that night, only staying out for about 3 hours before heading home to drink gin and tonics and watch Hostel.

In hindsight, this was a great idea, because Saturday night was decidedly less calm.

We went to see my boy Gerry the Irish bartender (formerly of Mustang Sally's fame) at his new place, O'Brien's. We were in there for hours (stopping only to brave Times Square to get some more Chaser pills from Duane Reade) so it got pretty sloppy.

Gerry, ever the shy one, doesn't want to be splashed all over the Internet, so I'm pixelating his ass.

Our new friend Finton (also Irish) is less shy, and equally fun.

After we'd gotten sufficiently sauced there, we decided to head on over to the Irish Rogue to see Mick and Roger, whom you may remember as Paris and Nicky from last Halloween. Roger apparently works somewhere else now, but Mick was there and as adorable as ever.

Obviously we made it home somehow, but the details of that are somewhat sketchy. All I can say is I felt fine the next day, and that Chaser Pills are like the Second Coming for me.

Ahh, and then there was Sunday.

The daytime was spent watching the Keane Strangers DVD about 5 times before getting ready to go to Rufus. When we got to the park, we called my amazing friend Jay, who ever so kindly escorted us into the VIP area before the main doors opened. For this I will be eternally grateful! It was raining and the VIP area had umbrellas and tables so it was far less dismal than it could have been. THANK YOU JAY!!

Before the party began.

Second to arrive in the VIP area was Chris, a guy whom Kat swore she knew from somewhere. She thought it was school, but it turns out they "got drunk on a boat in New Jersey together" once, so there you go.

Chris had two other friends show up, Matt and Michael, and my life has not really been the same since. :-)

Matt turned out to be a tall, gay, Southern version of me, seriously. He was like my cosmic twin ("non-sexual soul mates" as he so sweetly put it) and if he were more vaginally inclined, I'd have whisked him off to Vegas and married him before the end of the night. For reals. We had like the best time ever.

I don't even remember much of the concert because we laughed most of the way through it (mostly at the guy whose dancing style made us happy there was one of those seizure dogs nearby). In fact, I swear that guy was from TV, but I couldn't place him. He looked a lot like Thom from Queer Eye, but I don't think it was. Plus, I would hope Thom dances a little better than that.

Oh God, what if it was him and he reads this? Actually, maybe it's good if he does. Dude, your dancing -- work it out. Thanks.

Dark shot, but you can probably still make out the Leiderhosen.

Anyway, we were all really hopped up on wine by the end of the show.

Some of us more than others, obvs.

We went downtown to hit up Phoenix, the gay bar whose CitySearch review says, "Gay-guy-loving girls should feel comfortable enough here" -- they're not wrong. It was so "swish" As Victoria Beckham would say. I mean, think about it -- here I am surrounded by cute guys buying me drinks, and not one of them wanted a thing from me! It was like my own personal heaven. Even when a guy walked in on me, mid-wipe in the bathroom stall, I didn't care. It was just like 'Whatevs, Hi!'

Kat, Matt, and I met a new friend, Blake, who invited us to his champagne and caviar party the following weekend (which, consequently, was the weekend that just past, so we'll get to that in a minute).

So anyway, it was like the best night evs. The weekend went by way too fast, and going back to work was extremely difficult, to say the least, but next thing I knew, it was the weekend again, and time for Blake's shindig. :-)

Matt and I met up on Friday evening, acting like the long lost soul mates that we are. We gave the Trader Joe's cashier a little comic relief before making our way to Blake's apartment. On the way there, Matt, like many before him, pointed out my resemblance to Kelly Ripa. I still don't see it, but with as many people that bring it up, there must be something to it. I'm going to have to figure out a way to work with that somehow. :-)

Blake's party was totally fun and his friends were really nice. When I move to London, I think I'm going to have Blake do my decorating for me because his apartment was like no other. Kind of like something out of a hip TV show. Loves it. Plus, my mod frock and accessorizing seemed to be a big hit, so I left feeling somewhat fabulous. Somewhat fabulous and somewhat drunk actually.

Matt and I decided on Phoenix "for old times sake" but not before being shooed away from outside of another nearby bar, completely undeservedly. This guy totes comes over and is like "Can you two bring it down a notch and maybe move behind the ropes?" (or something like that). The thing about Matt and I is that we are def obnoxious, but this was honestly one time when we weren't doing anything wrong AND we weren't being loud, so whatevs. We decided that "taking it down a notch" would consist of a diva head-flip and sigh of disgust from each of us, before prancing away, hand in hand, back to Phoenix. Yay.

Yeah, so Matt is about 9 feet tall.

The last clear(ish) memory of the night I have is standing outside and seeing Kat, who had been at work all night, walking up to us from the subway. She was saying something about being able to see us being "dramatic" from two blocks away (I don't doubt it). Actually, I do remember going to another place (damned if I know what it was called) and eating some fries and pizza, but most of the rest of the night had to be relayed to me by Kat the next day. Which is too bad really, because apparently she made a male go-go dancer cry, and I would have liked to have seen that.

I remember not feeling particularly bolloxed at the time, but I guess I was. Or maybe it wasn't the alcohol at all. Maybe Matt's just too intoxicating to be around. :-)

Either way, it was fabulous.

Saturday, Kat went to work again, whilst I did a whole lotta sleepin' and a whole lotta drinkin' water. Later in the evening, we met up with my girls Leilani and Pam for dinner at Blockheads (my favourite cheap ass Mexican place with the $3 margaritas) and drinks at Social.

I met Leilani at a Duran Duran after-after party two years ago, and I haven't hung out with her in ages, despite the fact that we're constantly trying to make plans! It was so good to finally make it work! Of course it would have been better if this random guy didn't keep coming up to us and thanking him for watching his drink while he smoked, but at least it had some comedic value. As did the guy in the black socks and Kat's recount of her day "in prison." That story never gets old! Plus we got to meet Leilani's friend Jule (Jewel? Forgive me!) who was so nice!

Unfortch, our wild nights had finally managed to catch up with us, so Kat and I headed home at 1am (the horror!) but it was still a fab night and another fab weekend! I definitely feel like I'm making the most of my remaining time in America, which is exactly what I want to do. No more mediocre weekends from now until January, baby.

As for mediocre blog posts, I obviously can't say the same. :-)

Morrissey Is a Man of His Word

2007-08-26T14:20:00.000-04:00

I've written before about how a Smiths reunion was -- to say the least -- very, very unlikely.

Quotes about dragging corpses and eating testicles were involved, which I think pretty much finalized things. Nothing was going to get them back together.

What I didn't know was that "nothing" included $75 million.

SEVENTY FIVE MILLION DOLLARS, people.

"Morrissey's publicist has confirmed the artist refused a $75 million offer to tour under the Smiths name in 2008 and/or 2009, with the only mandate being that Smiths guitarist Johnny Marr would be part of the band. The Smiths also declined a multi-million dollar offer to perform in recent years at the Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival in Indio, Calif."

-Billboard.com

As much as I, myself, salivate at the idea of such a reunion, I have to admire my boy for sticking to his guns. $75 million dollars would buy a lot of Quorn.

Run, Adrian, Run!

2007-08-21T23:55:00.000-04:00

Bitch is packin'.

Pic from Splash News via GFY

AOL: Bunch of Prudes?

2007-08-15T21:50:00.000-04:00

Earlier tonight, I was on AOL, and I clicked a link to a "Where Are They Now?" article on MTV.com about kids who were on album covers. The main photo accompanying the article was the naked, swimming baby from the cover of Nirvana's Nevermind.

There was one of those extremely annoying expandable ads that wouldn't go away, and it was covering a good portion of the article, so I copied and pasted the link in Firefox. Immediately, I noticed a distinct difference in the two articles.

Click the screenshots to see larger views:

AOL's version

Firefox's version

WTF, AOL? Parental controls (which I don't even have set up) are one thing, but that's just silly. This isn't 1950.

A Trip Worth the Traffic

2007-08-12T00:24:00.000-04:00

Last weekend I paid a visit to Micki and Jay in Virginia for the first time since they moved from England last October. The traffic on the way down was reminiscent of my last trip to the DC area, (Office Space, anyone?) but it was well worth it, because we had a great time!

I got to see the beautiful new house they're having built (well, I got to see the spot and a nearby model that looks nearly like what there's will be!) and I was well impressed! Plenty of room for me to stay when I visit, which, of course is the most important thing. :-)

Old fogies that we are, we had a relatively early night on Friday, eating pizza and watching... well, Office Space. It was nice to catch up though and have a quiet night, particularly in light of my somewhat wild "out til 5am, college-style" weekend with Michelle in NY the week before. Plus it gave me time to win over Maddie, their newly adopted cat.

The next day, rain be damned, we headed into DC to the National Zoo, which was really fun, despite being hot as balls. I have a soft spot for zoos (being an over-the-top animal lover and all) so you'd be hard pressed to find a complaint from me about the day. (Oh, well, actually, maybe the $3.75 "Three Cheese Sandwich" which was actually a small hamburger bun with -- you guessed it -- 3 slices of cheese.).

Aside from that nonsense, I think you can tell from the following pictures and videos just how much fun I had:

Like with these hungry pandas!

Note my astute "diaper" observation.

I also very much enjoyed the red-assed one as he got up and walked out.

How cute is this little hippo?

And his sleeping buddy?

I actually kind of felt sorry for the elephants, just pacing back and forth. They looked sad.
But that could totally just be the trunk.

Why the long face? *bah-dum-CHING!*

This is a "Capybara" which is essentially a giant hamster.

A giant hamster that does not like the look of me and my camera, apparently.

He seemed to want to get out.

I have no idea what this thing is, but how freaking cute is it?
That serious face!!

He seems suspicious of me too. Can't say I blame him.

Okay, best part of the day...

MEERKATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These are my FAVOURITE!!

This little guy kept staring upwards so intently...

While this one inspected this weird white cloth...

Staring...

How much do I love when they stand like this?

Still staring...

Intensely digging...

Are we on Marnie's World, or Cute Overload, for God's sake?

And now for the video! Yay! Keep an eye out for the baby.

AHH! Cutest thing in the history of creation!!! I could watch them all day.

The second cutest thing could well be Prairie Dogs.

He even gave me a view from both angles!

Lazy orange monkeys of some kind...

Lazy humans...

All kidding aside here, why the hell do I look like a hunchback with child in this picture?

Anyway, back to the monkeys...

Freaky gigantic lobster...

An even freakier mystery sea creature, and the biggest hermit crab I've ever seen...

This gorilla was so cute, but his glass was kind of dirty so it was hard to see him.

His friend was OUT like a light! Watch...

Orangutans are another fave of mine...

Just hangin' around!

I know it's just his natural look, but this guy just seemed SO sad!

Probably doesn't help that he was passed out.

My turtle, Nigel, is about the size of a quarter. How funny would it be if ended up as big as this guy?

Watch him in action...

Tired tigers...

Chilling lions...

Another weird mysteray animal...
I have no idea what this thing is. Part rabbit part squirrel part hamster?

A rabirellster?

Or maybe a Wuzzle?

I got the name of the Wuzzle totally wrong by the way. I said Bumblebear, but it was Butterbear and Bumblelion. Idiot.

After sweating our way through all the adorable exhibits, we headed back home to shower our nasty asses and head to Chili's.

After that? A hardcore game of Scattergories, complete with the thickest mudslides you ever had in your life. Hot.

Look how it doesn't even move!

Thank heavens for spoons!

The weekend went by a little too fast but it was well worth the drive! Thanks to Micki and Jay for hosting me. Not quite sure I ever won over Maddie, but it was still a weekend full of friends, food, frozen drinks, animals, AND Scattergories? Who could ask for anything more?

Don't act like you're not jealous.

Just don't. ;-)

How Old is Katie Holmes?

2007-08-11T23:14:00.000-04:00

Because my grandmom called. She wants her pants back.

Oh wait, no she doesn't. Even she thinks they're awful.

PS Suri is muy adorable.

The Man Who Made Me Vegetarian

2007-08-11T14:00:00.000-04:00

Because I can never blog about anything right after it happens, I think now would be a good time to talk about the Morrissey shows I went to a few weeks ago.

As I've mentioned approximately 4,792,571 times on this site, I worked for Morrissey during the You Are the Quarry tour, and it was pretty much the best thing ever. Aside from being so much fun and meeting so many cool people, it also ultimately turned me vegetarian, so mad props to Moz for that one.

Anyway, I hadn't seen Morrissey or his band since December of '04 so I was happy to hear he'd be coming around. After a glitch here and there, he finally managed to make it to Philly and Atlantic City. New York was canceled, but two out of three ain't bad.

When I got to the Mann Center in Philly, I ran into my beloved Ginge, whom I met backstage at Radio City in '04, and subsequently traveled throughout England and Ireland with during the last legs of the Quarry tour. We caught up and had a drink or two before the show, then settled in for all that Morrissey goodness that we've come to know and love.

The show itself, as usual, was great. While nothing will ever top the second night at Earl's court 2 and a half years ago, I was not disappointed. I had a fantastic seat, which only got better after I jumped the barrier into the pit. Morrissey had said something like "Did you know that if you fill in this empty space here (between the pit and the orchestra) the city of Philadelphia will blow up?" It was actually much more drawn out and dramatic than that, Moz-style, but it was funny, and it afforded me the opportunity to run up to the front. So yay.

After the show, courtesy of the lovely Arturo, I went to the afterparty, where I got to catch up with my old friends. The adorable Mikey, whom you've read about on here before, and the hilarious Boz. Deano and Gary aren't on this tour, and I didn't get to see Jesse, but Mikey and Boz are more than enough because they're awesome in every way.

We weren't back there very long before the band had to go, but it was long enough for me to decide that I was definitely going to the AC show the following night.

I headed down to AC after work and kind of just walked around the Borgata getting sufficiently sauced whilst waiting for Ginge and my new friend Marisa to arrive. While I was waiting, a guy walked up and just handed me a ticket, which was hilarious. I tried to give it back to him but he just kept saying "Nah, I can't even give it away. Just take it."

Ginge says he wishes he had my luck.

We got a few drinks in the Borgata's Gypsy Bar before heading into the show.

Once again the show was great, and that has nothing to do with the fact that I was three sheets to the wind. Afterwards we got some food while we waited for Boz to have "a meeting with Morrissey" before meeting us in Gypsy Bar for a few drinks.

Once in Gypsy Bar, Boz got the biggest Appletini I've ever seen and it was really good, so I followed suit. Of course mine wasn't near as good. I guess it's because I'm not famous.

Ginge wishes he had my luck, but I'll bet he's glad he doesn't have my double chin.

Right after this shot was taken, I asked Boz what he thought I was going to blow on the Breathalizer on the way home.

He took this shot of himself. Always the comedian!

Shortly thereafter, Boz was dragged away by Morrissey's assistant so they could head to the airport (boo!). It was probably for the best though because I needed a little time to sober up before making the trek home!

All in all, it was great to see everyone and Morrissey didn't disappoint (well, maybe a little when he didn't play "There is a Light" but that's a whole different story).

As an addendum, I was at the Mann Center again last night to see Crowded House, and I could hear a nearby security guard saying to someone "We had a guy here a few weeks ago who was a vegetarian, so he said there was to be no hamburgers or hot dogs. Then everyone was running up on the stage and we were throwing people left and right. And he was encouraging it!"

That's our Moz. :-)